for display only
Big Blue Interactive The Corner Forum  
Back to the Corner

Archived Thread

NFT: More on internet shaming from Jon Ronson

Greg from LI : 3/6/2015 10:32 am
We had a good discussion on this a while back. Now, Esquire has published an excerpt from Ronson's book on the subject. As you'll see, some people have no decency.
Link - ( New Window )
interesting story, never heard it  
Stu11 : 3/6/2015 11:53 am : link
Very interesting how in the end it has pretty much ruined her current life whereas he has picked up the pieces and is doing much better despite the opposite right after the incident.
almost makes one believe in karma  
Greg from LI : 3/6/2015 12:00 pm : link
.
This story really illustrates how wrong shaming can get  
montanagiant : 3/6/2015 12:01 pm : link
Over something truly innocent. Its almost to a level of bullying in this case

The last discussion with the story about the PR Lady was really an interesting one in that you had one side sympathy due to how bad it got for her, and on the other side the fact that what she said was intentional and she should have known better being a PR person.

Interesting story  
Matt M. : 3/6/2015 12:22 pm : link
Why was her inappropriate joke just glossed over?

The shaming aspect depicts the slippery slope that is the internet. This is an interesting string of events. On one hand, in her interview, she comes across as crazy. On the other hand, it is very easy for their jokes to be taken as innuendos, which are not to be shared in a professional setting. On another hand, the hate directed at her was way over the line. There's a lot going on here.
Matt,  
Bill L : 3/6/2015 12:23 pm : link
do you find it difficult to buy gloves?
She's gotta daddy issues the size of the Grand Canyon  
Greg from LI : 3/6/2015 12:27 pm : link
Yes, what she then went through was horrific, but it's hard to gin up a whole lot of sympathy for her when she has absolutely none for the man whose life she tried to ruin. Prattling on about "Well, he's responsible for his actions, his joke is what started all this" - well, I suppose that, using her logic, her taking that picture and sending it out on Twitter is what ended up with her getting death threats, huh?
yea greg at least from the angle that this was written  
Stu11 : 3/6/2015 1:01 pm : link
it appears like he is the much better person here. The fact that she blames a silly joke he whispered to his friend for losing his job is quite horrific frankly.
RE: Matt,  
BeerFridge : 3/6/2015 1:18 pm : link
In comment 12166786 Bill L said:
Quote:
do you find it difficult to buy gloves?


hahaha!
I would say that the reaction to what she did from the MRA  
BeerFridge : 3/6/2015 1:27 pm : link
was pretty outsized, even compared to getting a dude fired. It's crazy. The internet is a fucked up place. She shouldn't have to face that because that's ridiculous.

But.... I've worked in the tech business my entire career. I've made and heard "dongle" jokes many many times. If he wasn't talking to her, she went out of her way to jump all over one of the oldest fucking nerd jokes in the software business. I'd say that it seems she overreacted. You're in a crowded place for chrissakes. Your ears can't stand a terrible joke about a penis and just move on from there?

Lastly, I've worked at startups that were like Frat houses and places that operate like traditional businesses. When you are at a conference you represent your place of employment. At this point you should know you can't make dick jokes. Be a professional.

Lots of fuckups in this story.
My biggest problem  
mcr2343 : 3/6/2015 3:15 pm : link
Is with the guy's company firing him. Reacting to an infintesimally small public outcry like that created the whole problem. It would have just disappeared if they had just handled it internally.

Frankly, I hope firing him has been a worse PR move for them and resulted in more backlash from the public than any off color joke ever would have caused
Terrible all around  
mrvax : 3/6/2015 4:48 pm : link
I can see how the lady may have taken offense to a crude joke. She could have warned them right then and there. If they continued, I believe she would be within her right to tattle.

She played the role of being offended but yet a few weeks earlier she told a similar penis joke online? Pretty hypocritical IMO.

No way did either deserve a firing. If the comment was directed at a co-worker, that would be a different story. Maybe the 2 guys should have been sent by HR to a "sensitivity training" class and let it go at that.


sad all around...  
Pete in CO : 3/6/2015 5:16 pm : link
...juvenile comment. Overreaction. Sadistic, faceless comments far worse than what actually started the snowball rolling. And this is becoming more common...

If she knew who said it - why not stand up and say what she felt right to them then. Even say it out loud if you want to make a splash. "Really?" "A dick joke?" "What are you 12?" It all could've ended there...

Too much anger. Not enough basic human consideration. The faceless mob mentality behind social media can be really depressing at times.
There was a Sunday Times magazine article 2 weeks ago...  
manh george : 3/6/2015 5:34 pm : link
on the same topic.
Link - ( New Window )
Btw...  
manh george : 3/6/2015 5:42 pm : link
the woman's claim that overhearing a dongle joke made her feel unsafe, and justified her massive overreaction, leaves me with little sympathy for her, except over the death threats and the like.

Suggesting that she was unsafe and that he deserved his fate means that she was either too immature or too emotionally disturbed to have a highly professional position in the first place.

"“Hank’s actions resulted in him getting fired, yet he framed it in a way to blame me. If I had two kids, I wouldn’t tell ‘jokes’"

Utter paranoid bullshit. Now she can't find a job. Tough. I wouldn't hire her, either.
RE: Btw...  
mrvax : 3/6/2015 5:58 pm : link
In comment 12167436 manh george said:
Quote:
the woman's claim that overhearing a dongle joke made her feel unsafe, and justified her massive overreaction, leaves me with little sympathy for her, except over the death threats and the like.

Suggesting that she was unsafe and that he deserved his fate means that she was either too immature or too emotionally disturbed to have a highly professional position in the first place.

"“Hank’s actions resulted in him getting fired, yet he framed it in a way to blame me. If I had two kids, I wouldn’t tell ‘jokes’"

Utter paranoid bullshit. Now she can't find a job. Tough. I wouldn't hire her, either.


George, She'd be better off finding a job where she can work remotely in the safety of her home. Unsafe b/c of a stupid joke at a conference? That's a problem. Hers.
Quite an interesting story  
bigbluehoya : 3/6/2015 6:12 pm : link
Just my view, but...

A) you're truly offended by that joke? Lighten up. But, being offended by just about any little thing and reacting accordingly is sadly tolerated these days, so let's just throw out A for the sake of argument.

B) you're truly offended by that joke? GET THE FUCK UP OUT OF YOUR CHAIR AND SPEAK HUMAN-TO-HUMAN with either the person who offended you or, if that's just too intimidating and dangerous, the organizer of the event. Taking it straight to the Internet is garbage. You can reverse engineer whatever kind of justification you want, but I'm calling bullshit.

C) "If I had two kids, I wouldn't tell jokes"
-first, step down off of your high horse
-next, go fuck yourself repeatedly
-last, thank god you don't have 2 kids because I bet they would be insufferable just like you are



Of course, none of this justifies the way the Internet attacked her afterward. There's no condoning that. Pretty scary stuff.

But I have far, far more sympathy for Hank.




While not Internet shaming, I thought this article from Buzzfeed  
RC02XX : 3/7/2015 11:32 am : link
Regarding Internet trolling (tweets in this case) was sort of related to this topic.

Quote:
This Is What It’s Like To Go To Prison For Trolling

In January 2014, two people were found guilty of sending death and rape threats to the feminist campaigner Caroline Criado-Perez in the most high-profile online abuse case Britain has yet seen. They told BuzzFeed News why they did it – and what happened next.

Link - ( New Window )
Back to the Corner