for display only
Big Blue Interactive The Corner Forum  
Back to the Corner

Archived Thread

NFT: The right to not be offended.

Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 11:37 am
Let me preface this first with my personal bias. I tend to be liberal on many social issues. I sympathize with the struggles of minorities and do believe that the playing field is still slanted (although not nearly as much as it used to be) in favor of white hetero males in this country. I'm 43 and have worked in a steel foundry for 22yrs. Steel foundries aren't exactly the bastion of PC culture, so we accept a lot of non-PC behavior that wouldn't be allowed in most workplaces. Don't get me wrong- the same rules certainly apply to us, it's just that it's extremely rare for anyone to report.

So- over the years I've really noticed a rise in this idea that regardless of intent, if someone is offended, the "offender" is automatically in the wrong and must alter their speech/behavior to acomidate the offended party. To be fair, I encounter this most often reading on the Internet- but I have also encountered it more often in real life over the past few years.

It seems to me this is coming for the most part from the younger generation (millenials).

So- a few thoughts/questions that I'd like to get feedback on:

-Where does this idea come from?
-If the offending party is not attempting to be offensive, do they have a responsibility to change their behavior?
-Where is the line drawn? Obviously there's blatant offensive speech (nigger and the like), then ignorance/culture change (older folks referring to black folks as "colored"), but there's also purely innocent/socially acceptable by most (referring to black folks as "black).
-I this trend I'm seeing merely perception? Is it really just a vocal minority?
-What effect does it have on society overall, if any?

Your thoughts?
This is not just true of millenials.  
stockton : 2/6/2016 11:41 am : link
this idea has reached everyone.

It is worse than just "the right to not be offended". Most of the time it is a race to be offended, so you can claim some moral high ground.
I think it has become ridiculous  
jcn56 : 2/6/2016 11:42 am : link
But I also think it's allowed some people who have legitimately offended to back up and say 'hey, hasn't this stuff gotten out of hand?'.

I do think common manners should apply, but I hate the use of the word 'wrong'. If my name is John - if someone calls me Johnny and I don't like it, it's as simple as 'I prefer John, please don't call me that'. I wasn't wronged, the person goofed and if he corrects it, there was no harm done.

Now, if I'm a Native American and someone says 'Hey, you Redskins tend to like those peace pipes, right?', now we're on to offensive territory.
The pendelum has moved too far  
AP in Halfmoon : 2/6/2016 12:00 pm : link
But do people want to return to the days where it's socially acceptable to insult women, blacks, mentally retarded people, etc?
RE: The pendelum has moved too far  
jcn56 : 2/6/2016 12:06 pm : link
In comment 12803071 AP in Halfmoon said:
Quote:
But do people want to return to the days where it's socially acceptable to insult women, blacks, mentally retarded people, etc?


No, but is it necessary to operate in extremes? Does everything have to be absolute?
...  
christian : 2/6/2016 12:07 pm : link
It's the classic, "this is why we can't have nice things," scenario.

If there weren't folks who who meant it and acted on it, the controversy of words would die down or never creep up in a social setting.

We've all seen plenty of social scenarios where the bar is high for acceptance and the inverse. In my experience it's less likely there is a whiney presence that causes a stink, and more often someone who's a real ass and is making people genuinely uncomfortable.
I think the majority  
Rob in CT/NYC : 2/6/2016 12:08 pm : link
Of people use common sense, and then the extremes complain that asking for black coffee is racist, or that they are sick of "PC bullshit" and their inability to watch porn at work.
It is the natural extension of the  
FatHeadTommy : 2/6/2016 12:29 pm : link
Because of the struggles for women's rights and minority rights, and civil rights in general, (which were all good and just and admirable), the masses came to incorrectly believe that they have certain "rights" that are not rights at all. Or they simply confused what their rights are. They have, for example, confused the Constitution completely in some ways. Instead of recognizing that free speech, the cornerstone of this democracy, gives people the right and the freedom to express themselves in ways that may offend others, they believe their "rights" include the right not to be subjected to the offensive views. NO. They have the right not to listen to those views or to counter those views with opposing ideas. But the right of the offender is protected, not the right of the offended.

When you combine this ignorance of the basic premise of our democracy with the complete coddling that the last couple of generations have experienced ... no surprise. They all got participation trophies ... and now high schools can't even post class ranks because the kids who didn't work hard and finished at the bottom might get their feelings hurt.

They need to get their feelings hurt. We are not giving kids an accurate sense of what adulthood is all about. In our effort to protect them from damage we have forgotten our primary responsibility is to PREPARE them.

Thank god my old man was tough on us. And the world did NOT coddle us back in the day.
extension of the 60's  
FatHeadTommy : 2/6/2016 12:29 pm : link
correction
If there was a definite right way to raise kids  
Headhunter : 2/6/2016 12:41 pm : link
most parents would. But what works for one kid doesn't necessarily work for another. You can't deal in generalities when talking about raising kids. There are kids that will never touch a drop of alcohol because one or both of their parents were alcoholics and that same kids brother or sister might become an alcoholic. One size does not fit all. Parenting is a fly by the seat of your pants deal, there is no playbook that works for every kid
Fathead Tommy  
Rob in CT/NYC : 2/6/2016 12:43 pm : link
Mostly horseshit....
I think what needs to be said, for both sides,  
buford : 2/6/2016 12:46 pm : link
just don't be an asshole. Don't say obviously racist/sexist things. But also, don't take innocuous remarks as racist/sexist when they aren't. It's the PC culture, that's where it came from. It went from equal rights to the right not to be offended. Unfortunately being offended is subjective. Most of the time if something offends me, I just shrug it off. But many people cannot do this.
I don't get offended easily  
Headhunter : 2/6/2016 12:51 pm : link
but I do get disgusted when something as horrific as the Holocaust and Hitler and the Nazis become acceptable as political comparisons for people running for or elected to office. It minimizes the the horror by becoming a political tag line
From working in the sewers, overnight at Walmart ,and public schooling  
Route 9 : 2/6/2016 12:56 pm : link
I've heard it all. I say, quit your bitching.
RE: It is the natural extension of the  
j_rud : 2/6/2016 12:58 pm : link
In comment 12803093 FatHeadTommy said:
Quote:
Because of the struggles for women's rights and minority rights, and civil rights in general, (which were all good and just and admirable), the masses came to incorrectly believe that they have certain "rights" that are not rights at all. Or they simply confused what their rights are. They have, for example, confused the Constitution completely in some ways. Instead of recognizing that free speech, the cornerstone of this democracy, gives people the right and the freedom to express themselves in ways that may offend others, they believe their "rights" include the right not to be subjected to the offensive views. NO. They have the right not to listen to those views or to counter those views with opposing ideas. But the right of the offender is protected, not the right of the offended.

When you combine this ignorance of the basic premise of our democracy with the complete coddling that the last couple of generations have experienced ... no surprise. They all got participation trophies ... and now high schools can't even post class ranks because the kids who didn't work hard and finished at the bottom might get their feelings hurt.

They need to get their feelings hurt. We are not giving kids an accurate sense of what adulthood is all about. In our effort to protect them from damage we have forgotten our primary responsibility is to PREPARE them.

Thank god my old man was tough on us. And the world did NOT coddle us back in the day.

Good post. So many people fail to realize that free speech doesn't exist to protect the things we want to hear, it exists to protect the things we might not want to hear. Like my father has been saying since I was knee high: no one has ever been granted the "right" to go through life without being offended. And when so,etching does offend you, pay it no mind and go about your business. Now that isn't to say we shouldn't stand up and express our opinions over egregious, inflammatory comments or what the courts have labeled "fighting words", but it applies to the little comments people misinterpret and get riled up about seemingly every day.
RE: I think the majority  
Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 1:15 pm : link
In comment 12803077 Rob in CT/NYC said:
Quote:
Of people use common sense, and then the extremes complain that asking for black coffee is racist, or that they are sick of "PC bullshit" and their inability to watch porn at work.


This is what I tend to think-from where I am/where I work. Nice to see that East coast/white collar sees the same.




RE: It is the natural extension of the  
Davisian : 2/6/2016 1:16 pm : link
In comment 12803093 FatHeadTommy said:
Quote:
Because of the struggles for women's rights and minority rights, and civil rights in general, (which were all good and just and admirable), the masses came to incorrectly believe that they have certain "rights" that are not rights at all. Or they simply confused what their rights are. They have, for example, confused the Constitution completely in some ways. Instead of recognizing that free speech, the cornerstone of this democracy, gives people the right and the freedom to express themselves in ways that may offend others, they believe their "rights" include the right not to be subjected to the offensive views. NO. They have the right not to listen to those views or to counter those views with opposing ideas. But the right of the offender is protected, not the right of the offended.



Can some please explain what this means?

As far as the offended party:  
Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 1:20 pm : link
Can someone else decide what they're allowed to be offended by?

Like the example of "black coffee".

I'm sure most of us will agree that the term isn't offensive.

On the other hand, can any of us really decide for someone else what is or isn't offensive?



And far too many people think that  
Deej : 2/6/2016 1:22 pm : link
the right to free speech means you can say whatever hateful, ignorant thought you have without being criticized for it.

Far too much push back against so-called "PC" (using "PC" as a shortcut, but Im not sure the term has meaning) right now IMO. Yes there are excesses, especially on college campuses. There is also a staggering amount of ignorance and demonization out there. The pushback against "PC" IMO is giving that talk more room to blossom, even as tolerance and empathy improve every day overall. Also reject the notion that its two sides of the same excess coin. Hateful speech is far more damaging.
I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Deej : 2/6/2016 1:24 pm : link
saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?
White people are the minority  
chillinman1183 : 2/6/2016 1:28 pm : link
In this country we are far outnumbered and should be considered a minority.

I also do not agree with you about the scale being tilted in in the favor of a white man.

There are certain instances of racial profiling but for the most part black people have more rights then i do as a white male.
They also have it alot easier as well,being able to play the race card where ever and when ever they like,and most do when something doesn't go there way.

I know because i've heard and seen it on many occasions!!

It's 2016 people,and it's time to put the past where it belongs,in the past.
RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 1:29 pm : link
In comment 12803149 Deej said:
Quote:
saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?


It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."

Well said jrud and Tommy.  
Dave in Hoboken : 2/6/2016 1:30 pm : link
The pushback against PC has gotten stronger than I thought it would.
RE: White people are the minority  
Davisian : 2/6/2016 1:35 pm : link
In comment 12803158 chillinman1183 said:
Quote:
In this country we are far outnumbered and should be considered a minority.

I also do not agree with you about the scale being tilted in in the favor of a white man.

There are certain instances of racial profiling but for the most part black people have more rights then i do as a white male.
They also have it alot easier as well,being able to play the race card where ever and when ever they like,and most do when something doesn't go there way.

I know because i've heard and seen it on many occasions!!

It's 2016 people,and it's time to put the past where it belongs,in the past.



Awww, poor whitey..

RE: Fathead Tommy  
chopperhatch : 2/6/2016 1:36 pm : link
In comment 12803111 Rob in CT/NYC said:
Quote:
Mostly horseshit....


I thought his post was spot on.

Good thread BTW Can.

Conversely, as a white, hetero, male, I have zero right to be offended. If I were to say something to one of the younger female co-workers that was along the exact same lines as what they said to me, my manager would tell me to get over it. Where as if they told him I said something that offended them, I would be called into the office for a sit down.

That's another thing, the younger generation seems to have very little regard for what they say and do. It is fairly evident that these kids (I sound so old saying that) really operate as if the world revolves around them. Which ties into Cam's original point. Younger people these days seem to think that the world must change around them rather than later their perceptions. And I think in large because it is encouraged by much of today's society.
"aw poor whitey?"  
Route 9 : 2/6/2016 1:54 pm : link
Is that you Mrs Polpovich or whoever taught that women in society class I had in college 6 years ago?
Cam...  
EricJ : 2/6/2016 2:13 pm : link
I think the most important thing that has gotten lost here is that offending someone is not only legal, but it is actually a right that is protected by the constitution.

So people, we don't have to be an assholes all day long offending people. If we are, then we should be prepared to get an ass kicking.

What I despise is the idea of passing laws to protect people's feelings.

This has gone way beyond PC. We are at the point now where people get offended even when they are not part of the group where the offense is targeted. How many white middle class apologists claimed to be offended by the Washington Redskins? None of those people were offended until someone recently told them that they should be...and the person (or media) who told them also was not of American Indian descent.

Link to a [i]Reason[/i] article...  
BMac : 2/6/2016 2:38 pm : link
...the does a creditable job of deconstructing the term.
What the Hell Does Politically Correct Mean? - ( New Window )
I have to agree with Jrud  
beatrixkiddo : 2/6/2016 2:42 pm : link
Fathead tommy, and Eric J. All great points.

It's clear there has been great effort over the greater part of the last century to water down many of the most basic rights essential for a generally free society, as outlined under the first 10 amendments of the Bill of Rights. History of civilization tends to be cyclical in this matter. So I expect it to keep trending that way, as we have quite a ways to go.

Freedom of speech like others have said, is there to say the things that may be most vile to some. If you don't have the right to offend someone, then you are not free at all. I think the problem of most people in the younger generation and culture of wanting to ban speech, the whole "safe rooms" on campuses for "offensive language", etc. is a long term result of generating a society that isn't taught or encouraged to think for themselves, and use reason. Now you hear of these B.S "micro-aggressions", what a joke really. It stems from the notion that is being put in kids heads that everyone is a victim, deflect blame for everything that has ever happened to you in your life, it's not your fault; what a completely shit idea. If this trend is only going to continue to grow, I want to be as far removed away from it as possible.
RE: I have to agree with Jrud  
Davisian : 2/6/2016 2:51 pm : link
In comment 12803247 beatrixkiddo said:
Quote:
Fathead tommy, and Eric J. All great points.

It's clear there has been great effort over the greater part of the last century to water down many of the most basic rights essential for a generally free society, as outlined under the first 10 amendments of the Bill of Rights. History of civilization tends to be cyclical in this matter. So I expect it to keep trending that way, as we have quite a ways to go.




For example?

It is okay to acknowledge that there isn't a level playing field  
Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 2:51 pm : link
while at the same time maintaining an internal locus of control.

I feel that nuance is lost on most.


I have never  
Rick5 : 2/6/2016 2:52 pm : link
experienced anyone getting offended by a truly benign comment in the real world. It doesn't exist in my world outside of stories on the internet.
RE: I have never  
fivehead : 2/6/2016 2:58 pm : link
In comment 12803262 Rick5 said:
Quote:
experienced anyone getting offended by a truly benign comment in the real world. It doesn't exist in my world outside of stories on the internet.


I think that the internet is the driving force to all this PC nonsense. I bet that if people left Facebook etc, they would be happier. All of the memes concerning race, welfare, politics, religion, and such must ake their toll on society.
take  
fivehead : 2/6/2016 3:00 pm : link
not ake, of course.
It helps to understand some basic concepts  
manh george : 2/6/2016 3:16 pm : link
Non-Hispanic whites comprised 60.2% of US population in 2014. Including white Hispanics, they comprised 79.6%. The number for non-Hispanics doesn't go below 50% before around 2050. Including white Hispanics, the number doesn't go below 50% in this century. Non-Hispanic whites are a majority in 46 states and a plurality in every state.

Why do white Hispanics get added in? Well, two of the major Presidential candidates are White Hispanics, and I doubt that they consider themselves oppressed minorities.

As far as the march toward considering every act except breathing to be offensive, I think the Universities are more to blame than anything else. There are a lot of factors to the University role, but it is indeed unfortunate that a very large proportion of kids nowadays go to college to learn how to drink on the one hand and to be offended by anything harsher than "I like you" on the other. I think then only solution may be to spend more time drunk.
Link - ( New Window )
intent of the speach  
SomeFan : 2/6/2016 3:29 pm : link
and associated action should be factored in.
I'm still waiting  
Davisian : 2/6/2016 3:57 pm : link
For someone to explain how rights have been "eroded"..


Did we start arressting people who like to say the N word? What's the incarceration rate on those who say all the vile shit?


The right is there. The Constitution never protected anyone from being called an asshole for their ignorant ass speech.

RE:  
Dave in Hoboken : 2/6/2016 4:14 pm : link
In comment 12803190 Route 9 said:
Quote:
Is that you Mrs Polpovich or whoever taught that women in society class I had in college 6 years ago?


Hahahaha.
Y'all need to check your white privilege at the door.  
Cam in MO : 2/6/2016 4:22 pm : link
CIS scum.

Anyway- during a Western Civ course over a decade ago, the instructor was off on a tangent about his pet peeve of people mispronouncing things. One of his many examples which he had written on the board was "Ku Klux Klan" being pronounced, "Klu Klux Klan".

A chick in the class was offended that he dare write it on the board and demanded he take it down. A ten minute argument about how words themselves don't hurt ensued until he finally relented.

So yes, I for one have experienced it many times in real life- not just on the interwebz tubes.
RE: RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Deej : 2/6/2016 4:36 pm : link
In comment 12803159 Cam in MO said:
Quote:
In comment 12803149 Deej said:


Quote:


saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?



It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."


Is it though? Is there a widespread movement to change the name of black coffee? Any movement? Or is it either an apocryphal example OR a one-off of one idiot being an idiot?

This is just my opinion, but a lot of the current anti-PC sentiment seems to be driven by white victimhood. It's a recent development. You can see it in chillinman1183's post. I dont want to get political, but it's in a segment of our politics right now. It's especially prominent among men. Sommers & Norton's study showed that whites now view reverse-racism (ie. racism against whites) as a bigger societal problem than traditional racism (vs. non-whites). IMO the current backlash against "PC" (or tolerance in speech -- dont think there is a good term for it) comes from the same place. Yes, everyone can agree that there there are stupid examples of people being offended. Someone being offended by "black paint" is an idiot. But I honestly dont think that such outlier examples are driving the current national conversation.
Sommers - ( New Window )
RE: Fathead Tommy  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 4:37 pm : link
In comment 12803111 Rob in CT/NYC said:
Quote:
Mostly horseshit....


well I agree with Tommy and you've offended me
Well, you are a moron  
Rob in CT/NYC : 2/6/2016 4:44 pm : link
and always have been?
now I am even more offended  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 4:51 pm : link
...
RE: RE: RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 4:52 pm : link
In comment 12803396 Deej said:
Quote:
In comment 12803159 Cam in MO said:


Quote:


In comment 12803149 Deej said:


Quote:


saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?



It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."




Is it though? Is there a widespread movement to change the name of black coffee? Any movement? Or is it either an apocryphal example OR a one-off of one idiot being an idiot?

This is just my opinion, but a lot of the current anti-PC sentiment seems to be driven by white victimhood. It's a recent development. You can see it in chillinman1183's post. I dont want to get political, but it's in a segment of our politics right now. It's especially prominent among men. Sommers & Norton's study showed that whites now view reverse-racism (ie. racism against whites) as a bigger societal problem than traditional racism (vs. non-whites). IMO the current backlash against "PC" (or tolerance in speech -- dont think there is a good term for it) comes from the same place. Yes, everyone can agree that there there are stupid examples of people being offended. Someone being offended by "black paint" is an idiot. But I honestly dont think that such outlier examples are driving the current national conversation. Sommers - ( New Window )


I am offended cause my white privilege allows me to get up at 4 am and earlier everyday to make a living to pay for all the Free shit of the other offended types... everyone should STFU and take care of themselves
RE: Well, you are a moron  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 4:53 pm : link
In comment 12803406 Rob in CT/NYC said:
Quote:
and always have been?


PC is destroying EU right now, coming here soon...
Oh goodie, Paulie's 8th grade intellect  
kicker : 2/6/2016 5:03 pm : link
is opining on the welfare system and the EU.

Should be a barrel of fucking laughs to listen to them all.
now I am even more offended  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 5:05 pm : link
The very scary European far right will rise in Europe and the EU will collapse largely due to open borders and political correctness

save this post and lets talk in a couple years



RE: Oh goodie, Paulie's 8th grade intellect  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 5:06 pm : link
In comment 12803425 kicker said:
Quote:
is opining on the welfare system and the EU.

Should be a barrel of fucking laughs to listen to them all.


I am offended by the almost 100 million not working and I am paying for it, as are you
Stains eventually disappear over time.  
kicker : 2/6/2016 5:08 pm : link
Such is the way of life.
What  
Route 9 : 2/6/2016 5:09 pm : link
?
And somehow I seriously doubt  
kicker : 2/6/2016 5:09 pm : link
you're contributing much to these 100 million.

Intelligence is usually a pre-req for climbing up the working ladder.
RE: And somehow I seriously doubt  
Sarcastic Sam : 2/6/2016 5:12 pm : link
In comment 12803434 kicker said:
Quote:
you're contributing much to these 100 million.

Intelligence is usually a pre-req for climbing up the working ladder.


Counterpoint: Kardashian, Kim.
So, you're saying Paulie  
kicker : 2/6/2016 5:13 pm : link
sucked dick on camera?

Well, I mean, I guess it could help...
Sparkling intellect  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 5:30 pm : link
on display, your students loans are certainly money well spent.. you must have been an English major



I'm still offended
People who run an openly racist and homophobic website  
kicker : 2/6/2016 5:56 pm : link
aren't the gems of a community that should question the intellect of others.
RE: White people are the minority  
JesseS : 2/6/2016 7:45 pm : link
In comment 12803158 chillinman1183 said:
Quote:
In this country we are far outnumbered and should be considered a minority.

I also do not agree with you about the scale being tilted in in the favor of a white man.

There are certain instances of racial profiling but for the most part black people have more rights then i do as a white male.
They also have it alot easier as well,being able to play the race card where ever and when ever they like,and most do when something doesn't go there way.

I know because i've heard and seen it on many occasions!!

It's 2016 people,and it's time to put the past where it belongs,in the past.


Are you serious? You think it's easier being black? You think it's not unusual that lots of businesses and colleges the employment numbers are insanely skewed towards white people?

Also, you proved the EXACT opposite of the point you wanted to make.

"They can use the race card". So what about everyone else?

Listen, there are assholes all over the place. Al Sharpton, for example, is a fuck face. My friend was the guy framed by Tawana Brawley, the scum of the earth. People use shitty arguments of dickheads playing the race card when it has no place on that situation, as examples of black people using the race card all the time or using race to get the upper hand.

If you don't think there's such a thing as where privilege, holy shit.

There's something seriously wrong when an academic affairs office of 15 people at a college which is half racial minorities is 100% white. How is that possible? They were always the best?

Racism isn't this overt thing of calling someone a tar baby or nigger, though that certainly counts. The worst kind is people not being aware of the simple things like hiring someone that "just fits our culture more" when the other person was a better candidate. I've seen this happen. It's almost never been malicious or purposeful. It's a subconscious, well, this person looks like me and acts like me, so they're a better person to work with. It's not even always a race thing.

Shit. People need to be a little more introspective.
Link - ( New Window )
Serious question...  
trueblueinpw : 2/6/2016 7:49 pm : link
What's a "white Hispanic"?
RE: RE: RE: RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Randy in CT : 2/6/2016 7:51 pm : link
In comment 12803412 Paulie Walnuts said:
Quote:
In comment 12803396 Deej said:


Quote:


In comment 12803159 Cam in MO said:


Quote:


In comment 12803149 Deej said:


Quote:


saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?



It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."




Is it though? Is there a widespread movement to change the name of black coffee? Any movement? Or is it either an apocryphal example OR a one-off of one idiot being an idiot?

This is just my opinion, but a lot of the current anti-PC sentiment seems to be driven by white victimhood. It's a recent development. You can see it in chillinman1183's post. I dont want to get political, but it's in a segment of our politics right now. It's especially prominent among men. Sommers & Norton's study showed that whites now view reverse-racism (ie. racism against whites) as a bigger societal problem than traditional racism (vs. non-whites). IMO the current backlash against "PC" (or tolerance in speech -- dont think there is a good term for it) comes from the same place. Yes, everyone can agree that there there are stupid examples of people being offended. Someone being offended by "black paint" is an idiot. But I honestly dont think that such outlier examples are driving the current national conversation. Sommers - ( New Window )



I am offended cause my white privilege allows me to get up at 4 am and earlier everyday to make a living to pay for all the Free shit of the other offended types... everyone should STFU and take care of themselves
I grew up Roman Catholic and your hating everyone and not wanting to help the less fortunate, is anti-Christ so you are the devil. Which party do you associate with which should therefore be considered demonic? Just want to keep clear. Oh, and nobody wants to work hard and pay taxes so "some" can stay home and collect checks because they don't want to work. Thankfully, unlike your beliefs, they are few and far between.

Go post with Filmy on your redneck site, eh?
RE: Serious question...  
Randy in CT : 2/6/2016 7:55 pm : link
In comment 12803516 trueblueinpw said:
Quote:
What's a "white Hispanic"?
srsly?
RE: RE: Serious question...  
ctc in ftmyers : 2/6/2016 8:16 pm : link
In comment 12803522 Randy in CT said:
Quote:
In comment 12803516 trueblueinpw said:


Quote:


What's a "white Hispanic"?

srsly?


Clear as mud.


Link - ( New Window )
This is what gets me  
Larry in Pencilvania : 2/6/2016 8:33 pm : link
when I am told by my employer that I can't say to a co worker you look nice today or tell someone they have a nice haircut or that an outfit is pretty because that can be deemed as harassment. When did non sexual comments of a complementary nature become threatening and offensive? I can't say anything nice at work to someone in fear of losing my job? IMHO things like that have gone over the top
RE: This is what gets me  
Deej : 2/6/2016 8:39 pm : link
In comment 12803548 Larry in Pencilvania said:
Quote:
when I am told by my employer that I can't say to a co worker you look nice today or tell someone they have a nice haircut or that an outfit is pretty because that can be deemed as harassment. When did non sexual comments of a complementary nature become threatening and offensive? I can't say anything nice at work to someone in fear of losing my job? IMHO things like that have gone over the top


What should get you is that your employer is an idiot if they actually told you that, and that's the whole story.
RE: RE: This is what gets me  
buford : 2/6/2016 8:43 pm : link
In comment 12803554 Deej said:
Quote:
In comment 12803548 Larry in Pencilvania said:


Quote:


when I am told by my employer that I can't say to a co worker you look nice today or tell someone they have a nice haircut or that an outfit is pretty because that can be deemed as harassment. When did non sexual comments of a complementary nature become threatening and offensive? I can't say anything nice at work to someone in fear of losing my job? IMHO things like that have gone over the top



What should get you is that your employer is an idiot if they actually told you that, and that's the whole story.


Haven't you ever been in sexual harassment training?
Yes many times  
AP in Halfmoon : 2/6/2016 8:48 pm : link
And that is not harassment
RE: RE: RE: This is what gets me  
Deej : 2/6/2016 8:52 pm : link
In comment 12803558 buford said:
Quote:
In comment 12803554 Deej said:


Quote:


In comment 12803548 Larry in Pencilvania said:


Quote:


when I am told by my employer that I can't say to a co worker you look nice today or tell someone they have a nice haircut or that an outfit is pretty because that can be deemed as harassment. When did non sexual comments of a complementary nature become threatening and offensive? I can't say anything nice at work to someone in fear of losing my job? IMHO things like that have gone over the top



What should get you is that your employer is an idiot if they actually told you that, and that's the whole story.



Haven't you ever been in sexual harassment training?


Yes. I also have a B.S. in labor relations and as an attorney have represented several Fortune 500 & 1000 companies in employment matters.

There isnt a plaintiff's lawyer in the country who is taking a sex harassment case based on the comment "I like your haircut".
This is really the problem  
Deej : 2/6/2016 8:57 pm : link
Some fool makes up a standard, like you cant say "nice haircut" and of course it looks like sex harassment law has run amok. Except that's not even remotely the law. It's insanely hard to successfully press a hostile work environment claim, and you dont hear about them a ton. Even though there are a lot of salty work environments, or bad apples in otherwise good environments. But someone gets stupid HR training and suddenly the problem is the PC culture, and not ignorant training.
I can't imagine an employer would teach that  
AP in Halfmoon : 2/6/2016 9:03 pm : link
I'm guessing it's an incorrect interpretation of policy
Deeg  
ctc in ftmyers : 2/6/2016 9:30 pm : link
"But someone gets stupid HR training and suddenly the problem is the PC culture, and not ignorant training."

And there in lies the problem. Whether true or perceived, business, large and small will err on the side of caution.

Your hair looks good 1 month, Nice dress you have another, that new perfume?, smells nice the 3rd. Person gets fired the the next for what ever and it's a possible hostile work environment suit.

It's what is drilled into you.

Now I have been retired 5 yrs now and I don't think it's gotten any better. And I retired from the FD for Christ sake.

I can't imagine what is like in the real world.

Ctc  
AP in Halfmoon : 2/6/2016 9:34 pm : link
I would have to see that example to believe it. BTW, I work for one of the largest private employers in the world
Examples  
ctc in ftmyers : 2/6/2016 9:55 pm : link
like that were always put forth. Anything, no matter how innocent it may seem, can be construed differently by another.

I'm just talking about fellow workers, never mind the general public.

I've seen a guy fired on his first shift because he said something off handed to a secretary.

Deservedly so.

RE: People who run an openly racist and homophobic website  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 10:07 pm : link
In comment 12803459 kicker said:
Quote:
aren't the gems of a community that should question the intellect of others.



agree with you
but stop picking on Muslims

that offends me

RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Paulie Walnuts : 2/6/2016 10:08 pm : link
In comment 12803517 Randy in CT said:
Quote:
In comment 12803412 Paulie Walnuts said:


Quote:


In comment 12803396 Deej said:


Quote:


In comment 12803159 Cam in MO said:


Quote:


In comment 12803149 Deej said:


Quote:


saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?



It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."




Is it though? Is there a widespread movement to change the name of black coffee? Any movement? Or is it either an apocryphal example OR a one-off of one idiot being an idiot?

This is just my opinion, but a lot of the current anti-PC sentiment seems to be driven by white victimhood. It's a recent development. You can see it in chillinman1183's post. I dont want to get political, but it's in a segment of our politics right now. It's especially prominent among men. Sommers & Norton's study showed that whites now view reverse-racism (ie. racism against whites) as a bigger societal problem than traditional racism (vs. non-whites). IMO the current backlash against "PC" (or tolerance in speech -- dont think there is a good term for it) comes from the same place. Yes, everyone can agree that there there are stupid examples of people being offended. Someone being offended by "black paint" is an idiot. But I honestly dont think that such outlier examples are driving the current national conversation. Sommers - ( New Window )



I am offended cause my white privilege allows me to get up at 4 am and earlier everyday to make a living to pay for all the Free shit of the other offended types... everyone should STFU and take care of themselves

I grew up Roman Catholic and your hating everyone and not wanting to help the less fortunate, is anti-Christ so you are the devil. Which party do you associate with which should therefore be considered demonic? Just want to keep clear. Oh, and nobody wants to work hard and pay taxes so "some" can stay home and collect checks because they don't want to work. Thankfully, unlike your beliefs, they are few and far between.

Go post with Filmy on your redneck site, eh?



Randy never changes, yet He just offended me
I tend to see more complaining and entitlement  
santacruzom : 2/6/2016 10:28 pm : link
By those who are inclined to decry political correctness than I do by the targets of their derision. This thread is actually a good example.
RE: Yes many times  
buford : 2/6/2016 10:29 pm : link
In comment 12803564 AP in Halfmoon said:
Quote:
And that is not harassment


I don't think it is, but we were told that it was and that type of comment should not be made.
RE: RE: RE: RE: This is what gets me  
buford : 2/6/2016 10:32 pm : link
In comment 12803566 Deej said:
Quote:
In comment 12803558 buford said:


Quote:


In comment 12803554 Deej said:


Quote:


In comment 12803548 Larry in Pencilvania said:


Quote:


when I am told by my employer that I can't say to a co worker you look nice today or tell someone they have a nice haircut or that an outfit is pretty because that can be deemed as harassment. When did non sexual comments of a complementary nature become threatening and offensive? I can't say anything nice at work to someone in fear of losing my job? IMHO things like that have gone over the top



What should get you is that your employer is an idiot if they actually told you that, and that's the whole story.



Haven't you ever been in sexual harassment training?



Yes. I also have a B.S. in labor relations and as an attorney have represented several Fortune 500 & 1000 companies in employment matters.

There isnt a plaintiff's lawyer in the country who is taking a sex harassment case based on the comment "I like your haircut".



It's not a case for harassment, but in those silly classes you are told not to make those types of comments. Specifically because you don't know who will think it's harassment.
You statement is nonsense  
Deej : 2/6/2016 10:35 pm : link
If a class tells you not to tell someone "nice haircut" because that could be considered sexual harassment, it's a dumb class. I actually doubt that people are getting that kind of education from anyone qualified to give sex harassment training. In any event, that discussion would be about stupid training rather than PC run amok.
RE: Serious question...  
81_Great_Dane : 2/6/2016 10:45 pm : link
In comment 12803516 trueblueinpw said:
Quote:
What's a "white Hispanic"?
To take a few examples who are pretty famous and easy to look up: Emmanuel Lubezki, son of Holocaust survivors, Mexican born. He is Mexican and therefore "Hispanic" but as white as it gets.

I once dated a Brazilian reporter who is very very "white."

If you didn't know what Guillermo del Toro looked like, and found a random photo of him in a magazine, you'd never say "Oh, that guy's Mexican." Sofia Vergara, from Colombia, similar - you wouldn't know she's Latina until she talks.

Eva Longoria, Alfonso Cuaron maybe you would. Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu, probably.

But there are lots of people from Hispanic countries and cultures who are as "white" as it gets, by complexion and hair color.
What someone may stupidly consider to be harassment  
Deej : 2/6/2016 10:48 pm : link
or discriminatory cant be guarded against. I once defended a very large company in a racial discrimination case. The plaintiff's only two piece of evidence for discrimination were (1) he didnt get training on a piece of software that the company didnt use, and which none of the other 15-20 people who did his job got training on, and (2) the company had a TV ad featuring an NBA player that the plaintiff thought was racist.

You can give training to help ward off employment claims. You can even cast a wider net in the hopes of staving off weak harassment claims. But if you train someone to avoid saying "nice haircut" you might as well not train them at all, because you're effectively depriving them the tools of normal human interaction.
My comments  
AP in Halfmoon : 2/6/2016 11:05 pm : link
Assume you're not saying nice haircut while drooling and staring at her breasts daily.

I've been around a while and have never seen a case where a sexual harassment case was successful and I've observed some very salty environments.
RE: Serious question...  
madgiantscow009 : 2/7/2016 1:52 am : link
In comment 12803516 trueblueinpw said:
Quote:
What's a "white Hispanic"?




in anatomy it has to do with similar skull structure.
RE: My comments  
madgiantscow009 : 2/7/2016 1:54 am : link
In comment 12803684 AP in Halfmoon said:
Quote:
Assume you're not saying nice haircut while drooling and staring at her breasts daily.

I've been around a while and have never seen a case where a sexual harassment case was successful and I've observed some very salty environments.


that is why I never mention somebodies hair unless it's ugly.

people love playing the victim for some reason, the more offended they are, the easier it is to do.

RE: My comments  
buford : 2/7/2016 7:22 am : link
In comment 12803684 AP in Halfmoon said:
Quote:
Assume you're not saying nice haircut while drooling and staring at her breasts daily.

I've been around a while and have never seen a case where a sexual harassment case was successful and I've observed some very salty environments.


Look, I think it's ridiculous, but I managed a department of people and you would not believe the idiotic complains that people come forward with. There was one woman who was convinced that a male employee was stalking her and looking at her 'weird'. Well that male employee was openly gay. She was psychotic. But what does HR do? Make him get sexual harassment training. To avoid the crazy woman from suing. Sure, she doesn't have a case. But the whole point of this type of CYA stuff is to eliminate even the possibility of litigation.
RE: RE: I've never heard of someone being criticized for  
Jon : 2/7/2016 11:22 am : link
In comment 12803159 Cam in MO said:
Quote:
In comment 12803149 Deej said:


Quote:


saying black coffee. Is this really an issue? Or a one off criticism?



It's just an example.

I did have someone (white) get offended when I said, "black paint", though. We were painting a fence at the barn with my son, lesson kids, and some barn parents. It pissed me off, but since they are customers I relented and apologized and changed my wording to, "Cosmo (my son), please stop goofing off and paint like everyone else."


See, that's bullshit. You should be able to call your son whatever you want.

Hell, I remember my dad calling me a "dumb chink" like it was nothing.
RE: RE: My comments  
David in LA : 2/7/2016 1:31 pm : link
In comment 12803745 buford said:
Quote:
In comment 12803684 AP in Halfmoon said:


Quote:


Assume you're not saying nice haircut while drooling and staring at her breasts daily.

I've been around a while and have never seen a case where a sexual harassment case was successful and I've observed some very salty environments.



Look, I think it's ridiculous, but I managed a department of people and you would not believe the idiotic complains that people come forward with. There was one woman who was convinced that a male employee was stalking her and looking at her 'weird'. Well that male employee was openly gay. She was psychotic. But what does HR do? Make him get sexual harassment training. To avoid the crazy woman from suing. Sure, she doesn't have a case. But the whole point of this type of CYA stuff is to eliminate even the possibility of litigation.


Your HR department is incompetent and wasted time and resources on bullshit. When I used to work in a corporate environment, I found HR to be useless altogether.
RE: RE: RE: My comments  
Sarcastic Sam : 2/7/2016 1:33 pm : link
In comment 12803957 David in LA said:
Quote:
In comment 12803745 buford said:


Quote:


In comment 12803684 AP in Halfmoon said:


Quote:


Assume you're not saying nice haircut while drooling and staring at her breasts daily.

I've been around a while and have never seen a case where a sexual harassment case was successful and I've observed some very salty environments.



Look, I think it's ridiculous, but I managed a department of people and you would not believe the idiotic complains that people come forward with. There was one woman who was convinced that a male employee was stalking her and looking at her 'weird'. Well that male employee was openly gay. She was psychotic. But what does HR do? Make him get sexual harassment training. To avoid the crazy woman from suing. Sure, she doesn't have a case. But the whole point of this type of CYA stuff is to eliminate even the possibility of litigation.



Your HR department is incompetent and wasted time and resources on bullshit. When I used to work in a corporate environment, I found HR to be useless altogether.


And yet if incompetence and wasting time and resources on bullshit staves off a lawsuit, is that the fault of the HR department?
Did it stave off a lawsuit?  
David in LA : 2/7/2016 1:39 pm : link
the chances of that making any traction in the court room is pretty damn low. You're talking hypotheticals.
RE: Did it stave off a lawsuit?  
Cam in MO : 2/7/2016 1:55 pm : link
In comment 12803967 David in LA said:
Quote:
the chances of that making any traction in the court room is pretty damn low. You're talking hypotheticals.


The issue isn't whether or not it gets any traction. The issue is simply spending the time and money answering a frivolous lawsuit.

But yes, for the most part it is fucking dumb, and actually very silly of HR.

The way to stave off idiotic stuff like this is to do what our HR does- call their bluff. More often than not silly shit like this is about something else anyway. I've been in meetings on more than one occasion after an investigation of some silly harassment claim where our HR manager explains why it is silly and then says, "we aren't going to do anything. You're free to take it to EEOC (or wherever) and see what they have to say.

Never seen it go anywhere after that.


Exactly Cam  
David in LA : 2/7/2016 1:59 pm : link
I can't imagine the psycho lady throwing around the harassment claims and pursuing an actual court case, unless she honestly thought she stood a chance. Is she going to want to spend her own resources on hiring an attorney to represent her? Is a good attorney going to want to represent her in a case with no leg to stand on?
RE: I have never  
njm : 2/7/2016 2:03 pm : link
In comment 12803262 Rick5 said:
Quote:
experienced anyone getting offended by a truly benign comment in the real world. It doesn't exist in my world outside of stories on the internet.


When was the last time you were on a college campus?
The right not to be offended is also used as a means to censor speech  
njm : 2/7/2016 2:11 pm : link
I opposed and expressed my opposition to the 1099 provisions of the ACA and the proposal in last years federal budget to reinstate them (they had been repealed). Some people disagreed with me on the basis of the relevant provisions. Others said I opposed them because Barack Obama is black which made me a racist.

You can avoid the intellectual exercise of crafting a cogent argument against someone's beliefs by merely claiming offense. It's the lazy way out, but has been increasingly used as time moves on. It's sort of PC on steroids.
RE: Exactly Cam  
Cam in MO : 2/7/2016 3:01 pm : link
In comment 12803996 David in LA said:
Quote:
I can't imagine the psycho lady throwing around the harassment claims and pursuing an actual court case, unless she honestly thought she stood a chance. Is she going to want to spend her own resources on hiring an attorney to represent her? Is a good attorney going to want to represent her in a case with no leg to stand on?


Well, to be fair- it's usually no cost to get an attourney. They take the cases they think will win and then get a %of the winnings.

Good luck finding one that will take a silly claim further than discoverey without getting a big retainer up front, tho.

There definitely are those that base their careers on big companies settling early, tho.

RE: RE: I have never  
BMac : 2/7/2016 3:06 pm : link
In comment 12804011 njm said:
Quote:
In comment 12803262 Rick5 said:


Quote:


experienced anyone getting offended by a truly benign comment in the real world. It doesn't exist in my world outside of stories on the internet.



When was the last time you were on a college campus?


You're seriously equating college campuses with the real world?
RE: RE: I have never  
Rick5 : 2/7/2016 3:49 pm : link
In comment 12804011 njm said:
Quote:
In comment 12803262 Rick5 said:


Quote:


experienced anyone getting offended by a truly benign comment in the real world. It doesn't exist in my world outside of stories on the internet.



When was the last time you were on a college campus?

Friday, February 5th, 2016.
Except that these issues on college campuses  
kicker : 2/7/2016 3:52 pm : link
really don't happen that often...
I just love the corporate world..  
EricJ : 2/7/2016 4:15 pm : link
makes me want to open a burger joint in the Florida Keys where I could call the waitresses sugar tits if I want...
I'd  
Rick5 : 2/7/2016 5:01 pm : link
be willing to wager that far more often than not these cases of someone being "inappropriately" offended result from people saying stupid shit and lacking the intelligence or insight to realize that they are saying stupid shit. In other words, they probably are actually saying things that most reasonable people would consider offensive.
Black coffee isn't a problem  
Peter in Atl : 2/7/2016 5:43 pm : link
Black hole can be.
Link - ( New Window )
Back to the Corner