NFT: Like a midget at a urinal, I was gonna have to be on my toes

I lived in LA for 3 months.

.

At least, I think she had her music. I don't recall her playing an instrument, or even being able to carry a tune......yet she was still on the road 360 days a year.

don't fire the gun while your talking


Nothing to see here, please disperse.


Do you wanna take a dinghy?
Nah, I took care of that at the press conference.

some kind of bust?

Yes, ma'am, it's very impressive, but we need to ask you a few questions.

It's Enrico Pallazzo!

No Frank...heroin

Uh Nordberg, that's a pretty tall order. You're gonna have to give me a couple days on that one

That's an awfully tall mustache.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, On the Waterfront.

Come on, there are no movie theaters on the waterfront.

Mayor: Drebin, I don't want anymore trouble like you had last year on the South Side. Understand? That's my policy.

Frank: Yes. Well, when I see 5 weirdos dressed in togas stabbing a guy in the middle of the park in full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards. That's *my* policy.

Mayor: That was a Shakespeare-In-The-Park production of "Julius Caesar", you moron! You killed 5 actors! Good ones.

Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girl dies in tragic blimp accident at the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.

-Goodyear?

Nooooooo....the worst.

getting caught in the gears of a combine, having your nuts bit off by a Laplander that's the way I want to go

Nothing to be embarrassed about, Hapsburg, I sometimes go by my maiden name.

I received a call from Mimi Du Jour, she wanted me to come to the club right away. Since I had no idea where the Club Rightaway was, I suggested to go to the Club Flamingo. She agreed.

but it appears the umpires have Creshone in a rundown

We would have come earlier, but your husband wasn't yet dead then.

Yes, the butler found it; it was tied to this window and thrown into the rock garden. I sent the note to the lab; they're demanding one million dollars.

Why would the lab demand a million dollars?

The kidnappers made the demand, Frank

Oh.

Lt. Frank Drebin: Hector Savage. From Detroit. Ex-boxer. His real name was Joey Chicago.
Ed Hocken: Oh, yeah. He fought under the name of Kid Minneapolis.
Nordberg: I saw Kid Minneapolis fight once. In Cincinnati.
Lt. Frank Drebin: No you're thinking of Kid New York. He fought out of Philly.
Ed Hocken: He was killed in the ring in Houston. By Tex Colorado. You know, the Arizona Assassin.
Nordberg: Yeah, from Dakota. I don't remember it was North or South.
Lt. Frank Drebin: North. South Dakota was his brother. From West Virginia.
Ed Hocken: You sure know your boxing, Frank.
Lt. Frank Drebin: Well, all I know is never bet on the white guy.