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NFT: What's the most dangerous beast you'd be willing to wrestle?

Howard J. Pants : 6/11/2017 11:38 am
For me, a wolf seems ok sizewise but the claws bother me.

A moose is just too big etc

I'd go with either a pony or William Joseph....You?

Alligator  
DennyInDenville : 6/11/2017 11:52 am : link
Or Labrador retriever
Probably  
Gman11 : 6/11/2017 11:55 am : link
a Yorkie. It would be tough, but I think I could hold my own.
I'm  
mitch300 : 6/11/2017 11:59 am : link
A whip so I'll say ant. If I have some alcohol in me maybe a roach.
My ex  
Steve L : 6/11/2017 11:59 am : link
I'm pretty sure I could take her
My mother in law  
superspynyg : 6/11/2017 12:06 pm : link
especially if she is trying to plant flowers in my newly done back yard or if she ever try's to "spruce up" my future man cave with her crap.


Her house looks like a combination of Pikes nursery and a hallmark store.
I'm 77 but my ex  
grizz299 : 6/11/2017 12:08 pm : link
is a year younger so I dunno. Probably take her if they made her fight fair.
Bunny Rabbit.  
Klaatu : 6/11/2017 12:21 pm : link
Well, maybe not.
Miniature poodle  
manh george : 6/11/2017 12:26 pm : link
A standard poodle bit me last year, so, no.
Ashley Graham  
OlyWABigBlue : 6/11/2017 12:35 pm : link
greco, roamin' or freestyle
Lena Dunham  
jnoble : 6/11/2017 12:49 pm : link
Before she switches careers to replace the Michilan Man hawking tires by waving her arm at passing traffic
That's easy my wife  
Dave on the UWS : 6/11/2017 12:59 pm : link
It would be over in moments and I would feel no pain
Beast?  
Trainmaster : 6/11/2017 1:06 pm : link
The aforementioned Lena Dunham. A bonus challenge would be Rosie O'Donnell or Rosanne Barr.
My wife  
djm : 6/11/2017 1:16 pm : link
..
LOL  
mavric : 6/11/2017 2:43 pm : link
Quote:
a wolf seems ok sizewise but the claws bother me


Trust me, the claws are the least dangerous things to worry about with a wolf. They have wicked long and sharp teeth and instinctively know that they must go for your throat and rip it out - and that's just what that very strong animal will do if you fought it.

It is stupid to fight a wild animal as their instincts tell them it's a life and death struggle for them. Their mentality: "kill or be killed".

You wouldn't want to mess with any animal in the weasel family. A mink will rip you to shreds, but a badger or wolverine will kill you and probably feast on your corpse. Even the tiny weasel (about the size of a chipmunk) is the smallest animal known to attack a man. Little shits think they can take down anything. And they're too damn fast to even get your hands on them.

Nothing in the wild feline category is going to turn out well. You will lose in the end.

You have a fighting chance with many in the canine family: fox, coyote, etc., but you are going to end up going to the hospital to get stitches on half your body.

A raccoon will tear you apart like a badger if they think they are cornered and their life is in danger.

A porcupine or a skunk will make you wish you stayed far away from them after a close encounter.

You could probably take down a small female deer, but a bigger one will kick the living shit out of you and a buck will end up killing you. Dittos with mountain sheep, etc.

Smart people leave wild animals alone. Fuck with the bull, and you'll get the horn....every time!
Ex girlfriend Ashley for 3 years  
Route 9 : 6/11/2017 3:22 pm : link
10 or so years ago. She was cute and young maybe weighed 115 pounds? Fast forward years later Lol she's gotten up to like...215...? I think I can take her.
RE: Ex girlfriend Ashley for 3 years  
jnoble : 6/11/2017 3:38 pm : link
In comment 13496161 Route 9 said:
Quote:
10 or so years ago. She was cute and young maybe weighed 115 pounds? Fast forward years later Lol she's gotten up to like...215...? I think I can take her.

Fit to fat? Sad but happens all the time. Just be glad you had her during the "fit" era lol
There is no way I lose to a wolf.  
est1986 : 6/11/2017 4:34 pm : link
In a life or death situation. As far any other beasts go, as long as i outweigh it, i like my odds.
Hope Solo is pretty dangerous.  
81_Great_Dane : 6/11/2017 4:40 pm : link
.
F U .....  
Beer Man : 6/11/2017 5:08 pm : link
All you pussies, my name is Millwall!
Kellyanne Conway  
Giants61 : 6/11/2017 5:12 pm : link
:)
Mavric  
Howard J. Pants : 6/11/2017 5:48 pm : link
That is some entry. Seriously. Thinking of printing it.
RE: Kellyanne Conway  
81_Great_Dane : 6/11/2017 6:31 pm : link
In comment 13496290 Giants61 said:
Quote:
:)
Well, that's alternative thinking.
run.....  
BCD : 6/11/2017 7:01 pm : link
don't f with wild game...saw a deer f-up a buddy.
Rachel Maddow  
I love liverwurst : 6/11/2017 7:47 pm : link
.
Got it.  
81_Great_Dane : 6/11/2017 8:11 pm : link
Kat Jennings.
Dennings  
81_Great_Dane : 6/11/2017 8:12 pm : link
Botched that joke.
So a raccoon can destroy any human  
DennyInDenville : 6/11/2017 8:13 pm : link
But Steve Irwan wrestled crocs for fun?

Idk.

To me a chimpanzee would be the last animal I'd wanna fight
RE: So a raccoon can destroy any human  
mavric : 6/11/2017 9:01 pm : link
In comment 13496371 DennyInDenville said:
Quote:
But Steve Irwan wrestled crocs for fun?

Idk.

To me a chimpanzee would be the last animal I'd wanna fight


Raccoons won't kill you, but they are mean son of a bitches that will attack and hurt you. Don't let their cuteness fool you.
When animals attack humans: Raccoon edition - ( New Window )
RE: RE: Ex girlfriend Ashley for 3 years  
Route 9 : 6/11/2017 9:27 pm : link
In comment 13496168 jnoble said:
Quote:
In comment 13496161 Route 9 said:


Quote:


10 or so years ago. She was cute and young maybe weighed 115 pounds? Fast forward years later Lol she's gotten up to like...215...? I think I can take her.


Fit to fat? Sad but happens all the time. Just be glad you had her during the "fit" era lol



Lol yeah she was real pretty when I was with her. I think she likes the booze and taco bell a little too much. I haven’t spoken to her in close to five years but I’d love to hear her bitch about it though because I knew how much she hated being fat. They all start to go down hill when they’re with Route 9, take it for what it is!
Logging in to say  
A-Train : 6/12/2017 2:09 am : link
I agree with mavric and could not have said it any better. Man has his moments but my bet would be on the wild animals in most bouts.
Groundhog  
I Love Clams Casino : 6/12/2017 8:14 am : link
They've stolen countless heirloom tomatoes from my garden, and I'm pretty sure the vengeance factor would kick in....
I had a raccoon come at me.  
Crispino : 6/12/2017 9:33 am : link
He was on my back porch late one night, blocking my way to get in the house. I went into my garage and got a snow shovel, because he started growling. I put the snow shovel on the ground, like a shield in front of my legs, and tried to scare him away. He came snarling right at me, on the attack. As soo as he got close enough, I kicked the shovel as hard as I could and it caught him flush on the nose, so he turned and took off. Gotta say, he scared the shit out of me with his aggressiveness. Glad I had that shovel, or I hate to think how that might have gone.
RE: Groundhog  
NoPeanutz : 6/12/2017 10:11 am : link
In comment 13496598 I Love Clams Casino said:
Quote:
They've stolen countless heirloom tomatoes from my garden, and I'm pretty sure the vengeance factor would kick in....

they're jonesing for a shot at clams.
RE: There is no way I lose to a wolf.  
Beezer : 6/12/2017 10:16 am : link
In comment 13496251 est1986 said:
Quote:
In a life or death situation. As far any other beasts go, as long as i outweigh it, i like my odds.


"You will lose."
RE: There is no way I lose to a wolf.  
Beezer : 6/12/2017 10:18 am : link
In comment 13496251 est1986 said:
Quote:
In a life or death situation. As far any other beasts go, as long as i outweigh it, i like my odds.


"You will lose."
I'm so confident you will lose  
Beezer : 6/12/2017 10:18 am : link
that I posted it TWICE!
Humans did not evolve to fight  
Don in DC : 6/12/2017 1:26 pm : link
animals unarmed or alone.

Unarmed, I guess I could take on a coyote or small doe, or most types of vermin, and escape largely unscathed if I had a good, thick leather jacket, jeans and steel-toes boots on.

Anything more than that and I need a weapon -- machete, bat, something.

And under no circumstances whatsoever would I ever want to tangle with any sort of ape in close quarters, no matter how I was armed. A chimp will kill you brutally, and fast.
RE: RE: Groundhog  
I Love Clams Casino : 6/12/2017 1:44 pm : link
In comment 13496724 NoPeanutz said:
Quote:
In comment 13496598 I Love Clams Casino said:


Quote:


They've stolen countless heirloom tomatoes from my garden, and I'm pretty sure the vengeance factor would kick in....


they're jonesing for a shot at clams.


I am jumping on my tiptoes while shadowboxing...bring 'em on!
Probably a Liger  
PA Giant Fan : 6/12/2017 2:01 pm : link
If I can use my spells
I'll wrestle any of you bitches...  
RC02XX : 6/12/2017 2:13 pm : link
Not going to deny that I may or may not get aroused a little, but I'll wrestle any of you, especially if you involve a heavy amount of oil in our wrestling.

What! Come at me, brah!
Giraffe, and it wouldn't be the first!  
x meadowlander : 6/12/2017 2:15 pm : link
For a short time, when I was younger - I used to travel with a carnival through the deep south - I wrestled giraffes, wearing a Mexican pro-wrester costume, complete with cape. I'd open by blowing alcohol into a torch, breathing fire and scaring the giraffe, then - straight for the legs!

Trust me, pinning a giraffe can be tricky, but once you get the hang of it, it isn't that hard.

I only retired from it cause it got boring after a while.
RE: I'll wrestle any of you bitches...  
David in LA : 6/12/2017 2:45 pm : link
In comment 13497134 RC02XX said:
Quote:
Not going to deny that I may or may not get aroused a little, but I'll wrestle any of you, especially if you involve a heavy amount of oil in our wrestling.

What! Come at me, brah!


Only if it's shirtless.

-Brett
Depends...  
T-Bone : 6/12/2017 2:49 pm : link
wrestle for what?

My (or my family's) life?

Or a bag of Cheetos?

I think this is a very important part of this question.
RE: RE: I'll wrestle any of you bitches...  
RC02XX : 6/12/2017 3:00 pm : link
In comment 13497164 David in LA said:
Quote:
Only if it's shirtless.

-Brett


Dude...if you know anything about me, I'm always shirtless...and I'm sleek with minimal bodyhair.
Think about it, folks. The animals  
Beezer : 6/12/2017 3:16 pm : link
aren't wearing clothing or gear.

You. Fighting a wild animal. You'd have to be naked in order to have the playing field be even.

Bet that changes some of your answers. You little bitches.
RE: There is no way I lose to a wolf.  
steve in ky : 6/12/2017 6:39 pm : link
In comment 13496251 est1986 said:
Quote:
In a life or death situation. As far any other beasts go, as long as i outweigh it, i like my odds.


LOL
RE: There is no way I lose to a wolf.  
mavric : 6/17/2017 12:30 pm : link
In comment 13496251 est1986 said:
Quote:
In a life or death situation. As far any other beasts go, as long as i outweigh it, i like my odds.


A wolverine weighs on average, 30 lbs and can get as big as 50 lbs. They will kill you no matter how much you weigh.

Watch the video as a little wolverine takes down a 500 lb bull reindeer. The deer never stood a chance.
Tenacious Wolverine - ( New Window )
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