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NFT: HS Coach Fights Back

Capt. Don : 5/21/2018 10:51 am
I coach varsity basketball and I have had the occasional malcontent parent that doesn't know their ass from the elbow but is nothing but negative. Nothing over the top but enough that I do question how HS coaches do it for 30+ years.

This historically successful coach from my area was let go after 30+ years because of "lawnmower" (I call them bulldozer) parents.

In a rare twist, he sued the parents that went after him and won. It got a little national attention.

Apparently you cant just lie about someone in order to get them fired. Who knew!?
Lonk - ( New Window )
Parents  
QB Snacks : 5/21/2018 10:53 am : link
dont wanna hear their kid sucks at a sport
Great story....  
Britt in VA : 5/21/2018 10:58 am : link
glad they got what was coming to them. Maybe they'll think twice next time, but I doubt it.
I hope his success convinces parents to act more like human beings  
Ira : 5/21/2018 11:23 am : link
in their interaction with their children's coaches.
RE: Parents  
Gman11 : 5/21/2018 11:58 am : link
In comment 13969792 QB Snacks said:
Quote:
dont wanna hear their kid sucks at a sport


Not only that. They think their child is really, really good and the coach is holding them back.

I coached baseball (one season was all I could stand), soccer and basketball. The kids are fine. The parents are the worst.
RE: RE: Parents  
Capt. Don : 5/21/2018 12:04 pm : link
In comment 13969931 Gman11 said:
Quote:
In comment 13969792 QB Snacks said:


Quote:


dont wanna hear their kid sucks at a sport



Not only that. They think their child is really, really good and the coach is holding them back.

I coached baseball (one season was all I could stand), soccer and basketball. The kids are fine. The parents are the worst.


Agreed. The parents that I have had a problem with are oftentimes parents of kids that I have a tremendous relationship with.

Oddly enough they are kids that get the most playing time.
I'm a coach  
Cap'n Bluebeard : 5/21/2018 1:21 pm : link
I coach rugby at the high school level. Our program is in its second year and growing strong. I can say without equivocation that parents are absolutely much worse than any of our kids. In fact, we're going through some serious drama right now.

We lost a game last Monday to determine whether or not we would be eligible for the State Cup tournament. After the game, one of our players confronted the ref in the parking lot. Apparently, he cursed at him and approached aggressively at which point the referee pulled out his phone to take a picture of the student. The player slapped the phone out of his hand, then fled. This was witnessed by several parents, who told the coaching staff. We immediately found the student, had him write an apology to the ref and the governing body, apologized ourselves, and suspended him from the team pending the league's investigation and punishment. The league responded with banning the player for the remainder of the year (at most two weeks, as it turned out we didn't advance past the tournament this past Saturday so...1 week). This seems absolutely fair given that, by the letter of the law, the player assaulted a referee.

Not to his parents though! To his parents, we threw their son under the bus and, since he is a senior, the league is handing down a "lifetime ban". Their logic is that he wasn't in uniform (broken collarbone) so the ref wouldn't have been able to identify him and that it was in the parking lot so he shouldn't even be considered a ref at that point. They are now attempting to get our former All-American, volunteer rugby coach "fired" and don't care if the school abolishes our program just to get "justice" for their son. Their son, who wouldn't have been able to play for the rest of the season anyway and who will be free to play rugby again next year in college. Their son who, unprovoked and by his own admission, assaulted a ref in a parking lot over a game that he didn't even play in. It's literally unbelievable to me. And it is somehow our fault for...reasons.
bluebeard i keep trying to understand rugby. after a player is  
gtt350 : 5/21/2018 3:19 pm : link
tackled everyone backs off and lets another player run with it. How does the defense get possession of the ball? It seems the offense can just keep taking the ball down the field. ty
I coach U-14 Softball  
RobCrossRiver56 : 5/21/2018 3:57 pm : link
In a rec league, I'm in my 3rd season. The first year the parents were a bit overwhelming. Last year I instituted a NO ARGUE THE CALL POLICY. We do not argue with the ump EVER. The umps call is final always. Between innings I will ask for an explanation which is always given but there is no more shouting over bad calls or balls and strikes.

Also, no parents or players are to confront the ump. All disagreements are brought to me and I go to the ump. If someone yells something bad from the stands to the ump and they are from my team, I give them a warning first then if they keep it up their player will sit next game. I have never had to sit anyone.

This one policy has given me control of players and parents when things get hot. What I tell the parents is, its not about You, Me the call or the UMP. Its about being role models and showing the players how to do the right thing when it is not easy to. We are here to develop players for JV and modified. Its about playing and having fun. Not winning an argument.
RE: I hope his success convinces parents to act more like human beings  
short lease : 5/21/2018 4:34 pm : link
In comment 13969852 Ira said:
Quote:
in their interaction with their children's coaches.


Nice thought Ira but, it is not going to happen.
I umpired when I was younger and then coached for  
EricJ : 5/21/2018 5:12 pm : link
about 15 years....
and I also found that parents ruin the game for the kids. I watched leagues crumble due to the parents. I watched kids quit completely due to the parents. I watched good coaches who no longer have kids in the league (dedicating their time) quit because of the BS from the parents... then the league ends up with a parent coaching who has no idea WTF he/she is doing.

Here is the best part. Countless times I would see a mom who thinks that it is ok for her kid to miss half of the practices for all kinds of "more important" things. Then, come game time they want to know why their kid is not on the field for the entire game.

I would start the season with a list of rules that I make sure that each parent reads. That way, there are no surprises. Parents may not have appreciated the approach but the kids always wanted to play for me.
RE: I umpired when I was younger and then coached for  
short lease : 5/21/2018 6:27 pm : link
In comment 13970369 EricJ said:
Quote:
about 15 years....
and I also found that parents ruin the game for the kids. I watched leagues crumble due to the parents. I watched kids quit completely due to the parents. I watched good coaches who no longer have kids in the league (dedicating their time) quit because of the BS from the parents... then the league ends up with a parent coaching who has no idea WTF he/she is doing.

Here is the best part. Countless times I would see a mom who thinks that it is ok for her kid to miss half of the practices for all kinds of "more important" things. Then, come game time they want to know why their kid is not on the field for the entire game.

I would start the season with a list of rules that I make sure that each parent reads. That way, there are no surprises. Parents may not have appreciated the approach but the kids always wanted to play for me.



A list sounds like a good idea Eric .... I would have made them sign it.
RE: RE: I umpired when I was younger and then coached for  
EricJ : 5/21/2018 7:29 pm : link
In comment 13970455 short lease said:
Quote:


A list sounds like a good idea Eric .... I would have made them sign it.


I e-mailed it. Then, also had one on one conversations with the parents about each individual player. Explained that they would be pushed whether it be physically or mentally so they can learn how to process the game faster.
RE: bluebeard i keep trying to understand rugby. after a player is  
Cap'n Bluebeard : 5/21/2018 9:49 pm : link
In comment 13970262 gtt350 said:
Quote:
tackled everyone backs off and lets another player run with it. How does the defense get possession of the ball? It seems the offense can just keep taking the ball down the field. ty


A number of ways. The defense can rip the ball out at any time as long as the offensive player isn't tackled on the ground.

The defense can intercept passes, which kind of difficult since the offense can only pass backwards, but it happens.

Another way which might be harder to explain or understand just watching a game is through a ruck. After a player is tackled, he is required to release the ball (he can keep a hand on it to keep it in place, but can't actively hold it). Defenders who are onsides (including the tackler, who must release the ball carrier and roll away, if possible) are able to take the ball at this point if they go straight over the ball carrier. Offensive players try to stop the defenders from making it to the ball. It's kind of hard to explain, but this is basically why it looks like there is a wrestling match over the ballcarrier between offensive and defensive players after most tackles (called a ruck). If defenders are able to get those guys out of the way, they can take possession.

The offense can also make mistakes, like knocking the ball on (a fumble,dropped pass, dropped kick or any ball touched by the offense that moves forward) or committing penalties like obstruction (there is no blocking in rugby so intentionally getting in the way of a defender is a penalty).

Offenses will regularly kick the ball away as well to pin the other team deeper in their own territory and try to force a turnover themselves. Sometimes you'll even see teams just kind of kick it back and forth, which gets funny/tedious until one of them kicks it out of touch (bounds).

It's a great game that I knew nothing about until I was asked to be a faculty moderator last year and moved to assistant coach this year. It's on ESPN's streaming service if you want to watch more, or there's a ton of it on youtube.
A close friend of mine  
djm : 5/21/2018 10:22 pm : link
Is manager of a big time NJ high school baseball team. Some of the parents are brutal.
RE: A close friend of mine  
gmenatlarge : 5/22/2018 8:18 am : link
In comment 13970778 djm said:
Quote:
Is manager of a big time NJ high school baseball team. Some of the parents are brutal.


Some parents are WAY too involved in their kids sports, how do they expect them to grow up and handle their own conflicts...
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