Thing is, how much is it worth to you to take that chance?
My dish would have to be REALLY awful for me to do so, and in that case I'd probably just not eat it and refuse to pay for it.
I already said I don’t send food back unless it’s sometbjng completely wrong like ordering a steak and getting fish. If I asked for it medium rare and it’s medium well I will deal with it. My reasoning is that I don’t want to wait any longer, followed by the chance someone fucks with my food.
Thing is, how much is it worth to you to take that chance?
My dish would have to be REALLY awful for me to do so, and in that case I'd probably just not eat it and refuse to pay for it.
I already said I don’t send food back unless it’s sometbjng completely wrong like ordering a steak and getting fish. If I asked for it medium rare and it’s medium well I will deal with it. My reasoning is that I don’t want to wait any longer, followed by the chance someone fucks with my food.
I bet it is rare for someone to mess with your food for sending back an obvious clear error. Where some people probably start doing things to return dishes is when it becomes subjective and poor reflection of their "skills".
Starting at 15,16 back in the early 1980s. Everyone worked in a kitchen of a restaurant, or waited tables.
I mean everyone almost. Very common.
Then, after work....dancing in nightclubs or watching live bands in nightclubs until 3 am 3 nights a week if not more.
Long Island was nightclubs - end to end.
Looking back, in some ways, it was horrible, once the edgy vibe wore off and the booze and drugs took their toll. And a world in which certain types of characters thrived in...you can imagine.
Before MTV, or any it's inception and before the internet, when there was still a huge staple of music - not played on the radio; Music Only found in clubs or on turntables, you felt as if you were carving out something new.
Rents were still cheap. Tribeca still had UN converted factory lofts. Empty. Frigging empty.
Cops were still allowed to give you a nice beat down.
People said that the 80s had greed. But that was a lifestyle option then, not a rule like now.
We had loose cash in our pockets and spent it all at night, each week. Why? I have no fucking idea.
We didn't think about the future. I mean our own lives and plans. Not because my dad and his dad died young. Nobody I knew or actually hung with gave a second thought about plans and lives. It was, tonight, tomorrow... What's right in our face right now. Maybe because this was pre-ummegration, we felt that low type jobs would always be there for us if we fell. Or...that we could fall back on middle class families, that we would be forgiven for our drug use and lack of vision.
It's so easy to forget how strong the pull of that life is for teens. And it's easy to overlook that booze and dope can freeze you in it FOREVER.
Anyone who calls this "selfish" really just doesn't understand depression and mental illness. I'm sorry.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
He inspired me to search for
lono801 : 6:45 pm : link : reply
And eat my first durian...
I hope he finds his peace...he brought a lot of joy to many people
More power to you!
Durian, sea cucumber and Vegomite are on the very short list of things I will never ingest again. I'll happily take a bite of Balut, with hot sauce and salt before lettin those other ingredients touch my tongue!!
By the way, unless I have a situation like steve in ky did with a raw piece of chicken, I will NEVER send food back. You can look at it as a cliche, I will not. Know too many people who say otherwise, including some fairly notable chefs.
seems like these cases get swept aside. There is a weird pattern of this going on in the last year.
Some rumored stories about Azerbaijan being responsible from Russian/Israeli blogger Alexander Lapshin.
Lapshin, who was sentenced to three years in prison by Azerbaijan for having entered the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh claimed Bourdain's death not a suicide.
Bourdain was officially blacklisted by Azerbaijan after filming the show in Nagorno-Karabakh. Azerbaijan declared Bourdain persona non grata in November of 2017.
Quote:
“Do you think this is connected somehow to his movie about Karabakh and Armenia? This man was widely criticized by Azerbaijan authorities because of that. Btw, just recently I have published the article in Le Monde called "Azerbaijani regime kidnaps and kills anyone it dislikes" and few days later this guy is gone by "suicide". Just short remind - they called an attempt of my murder in Baku prison as "suicide" as well) p.s Anton Nosik, the well known Russian journalist "suddenly" gone after his Karabakh visit as well, not to mention that Azerbaijan threatened him as well”, Lapshin said on Facebook after news on Bourdain’s death began emerging.
RE: RE: I suspect foul play in all these celebrity Â
seems like these cases get swept aside. There is a weird pattern of this going on in the last year.
Some rumored stories about Azerbaijan being responsible from Russian/Israeli blogger Alexander Lapshin.
Lapshin, who was�sentenced to three years in prison by Azerbaijan�for having entered the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh claimed Bourdain's death not a suicide.
Bourdain was officially blacklisted by Azerbaijan after filming the show in Nagorno-Karabakh. Azerbaijan declared Bourdain persona non grata in November of 2017.
Quote:
�Do you think this is connected somehow to his movie about Karabakh and Armenia? This man was widely criticized by Azerbaijan authorities because of that. Btw, just recently I have published the article in Le Monde called "Azerbaijani regime kidnaps and kills anyone it dislikes" and few days later this guy is gone by "suicide". Just short remind - they called an attempt of my murder in Baku prison as "suicide" as well) p.s Anton Nosik, the well known Russian journalist "suddenly" gone after his Karabakh visit as well, not to mention that Azerbaijan threatened him as well�, Lapshin said on Facebook after news on Bourdain�s death began emerging.
He inspired me to search for
lono801 : 6:45 pm : link : reply
And eat my first durian...
I hope he finds his peace...he brought a lot of joy to many people
More power to you!
Durian, sea cucumber and Vegomite are on the very short list of things I will never ingest again. I'll happily take a bite of Balut, with hot sauce and salt before lettin those other ingredients touch my tongue!!
By the way, unless I have a situation like steve in ky did with a raw piece of chicken, I will NEVER send food back. You can look at it as a cliche, I will not. Know too many people who say otherwise, including some fairly notable chefs.
Definitely no to Balut...my first experienced involved a beak and some feathers. Stinky tofu is the other absolute never again. I love durian and durian smoothies.
Vegemite might be the most vile thing I ever had. Sea cucumber is more of a texture thing and Durian is a stench thing, but taste-wise they are both better than Vegemite.
Anyone who calls this "selfish" really just doesn't understand depression and mental illness. I'm sorry.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
A point often missed. From just a very basic physiology, we've evolved to survive. To stray from that just logically requires quite a difference in the make-up of the person and the level of pain involved must be extraordinary.
Hehe, I don't know what's worse, that a thread on Bordain has Â
a tangent on sending food back, or that people in 2018 still haven't learned that there's only one instance where you're remotely safe sending food back in a restaurant, and that's when you've received the wrong dish.
Otherwise, never, ever, ever send anything back in a restaurant. Ever. And certainly, not because you think it was cooked 'wrong'. If you do that, might as well go lick the toilet yourself and eliminate the middle man.
a hard boiled egg. Add some hot sauce and it is really good.
You do have to hope you have a really young chick though. I've had ones that basically the lifeforms are just a little of texture, nothing with beaks and feathers.
Anyone who calls this "selfish" really just doesn't understand depression and mental illness. I'm sorry.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
A point often missed. From just a very basic physiology, we've evolved to survive. To stray from that just logically requires quite a difference in the make-up of the person and the level of pain involved must be extraordinary.
Christian - This might be an "apples to oranges" comparison but, remember 911? When those people were jumping off the floors that were on fire? There was probably very little thought going on in their heads. At that point when the jumped they were only thinking of one thing - survival. They were in heat that was so intolerable that they were looking for an escape (probably without thought) and they just jumped to escape the flames. Because they knew they were not going to survive the flames. It was an adrenaline reaction.
If a person was never in that kind of situation (I was. It was not 911 - but it was either react immediately or die and you don't think about what awaits - you are just trying to get out of the way of the moving train (going 70 miles per hour) that is 10 ft behind you).
Okay, maybe some of these folks - Kate Spade, Tony B., Kurt Cobain, Robin Williams, etc ..) felt emotionally the same way? It was their last choice. Most people (including myself, btw) won't understand it completely - but, I (because of my own experiences) will never judge.
but the way I was raised, was anyone who killed themselves was a coward and that is what Anthony will remain to me. My father told me at a young age, you have a duty on this planet and if you have kids, you raise them. You never give up and fight until the end as hard as you can. Not a single thing you can find wrong about that message.
You DO NOT kill yourself with an 11 year old daughter to leave behind. That is the most selfish, pathetic thing in the world. If you have the mental wherewithal to want to have a family, I am sorry, you have to fulfill that duty. Pathetic.
what’s pointless is your reaction. Won’t get into how you are raised but you come off completely uneducated here. You have no idea what demons he had and how they took hold of him.
RE: Looking and asking for reasons why is pointless Â
It's up to him to fulfill his duty and NOT take the coward way out
Did your oh-so-wise pappy also teach you that it is tasteless to speak ill of the dead? Especially in the immediate aftermath? I mean since we are getting on our high horses and all I should point out that you're coming off as a classless prick.
You also lack knowledge of mental illness, but I suppose that's true of many things.
Is there anyone out there who is on the same train Â
as I am where you are just so tired of hearing about 'mental illness'?
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here other than he was a guy who couldn't "cope with his demons".
If he was doing drugs, and that brought him to this "dark place: maybe he should've thought otherwise before using? He should've stuck it out for his family and their state of being comfortable with him in their world. That is sadly how I will be remembering him from this point on...
as I am where you are just so tired of hearing about 'mental illness'?
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here...
Is there anyone around on the same train as me where you are just so tired about hearing about "cancer?"
Seriously, fuck you and fuck your dead father. Maybe it's best he's not around to be a judgemental fucktard anymore.
as I am where you are just so tired of hearing about 'mental illness'?
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here...
Is there anyone around on the same train as me where you are just so tired about hearing about "cancer?"
Seriously, fuck you and fuck your dead father. Maybe it's best he's not around to be a judgemental fucktard anymore.
If the goal is to change peoples perception about mental illness and remove the stigma and preconceived notions about weakness, this probably isnt the best way to go about it.
And thats not even considering the troll angle.
RE: RE: RE: Is there anyone out there who is on the same train Â
If the goal is to change peoples perception about mental illness and remove the stigma and preconceived notions about weakness, this probably isnt the best way to go about it.
And thats not even considering the troll angle.
Hey, I'm sorry for the tone of my post. And I'm sorry I made it personal. It's not.
And the goal wasn't to change people's perceptions. Only to point out the fact that mental illmess IS AN (actually a broad spectrum of) ILLNESS(es).
Issues like weakness are irrelevant.
When it comes to their illesses, the ill don't have a whole lot of control when it comes to other people's perceptions. Might as well blame cancer on the victims' own bad attitudes.
My own sister died of cancer before her 51st birthday. And there's mental illness in my family too. I wasn't trying to do something grand. I responded to a post that pissed me off for it's judgementalism and hypocrisy and I took my anger out on the poster instead of the post.
So I apologise for the tone and personal nature of my attack.
But not for the idea that cancer sufferers are just as worthy of scorn and vitriol as the mentally ill.
Fuck the poster's "tired of hearing about the 'mentally ill' train."
That stands.
Dont get me wrong, i understand the frustration with that mindset. Â
Its about as backward and unproductive as could be. But when someone expresses such an uninformed opinion theyre just gonna dig their heels in. In truth, any response is probably wasted. Its hard enough to have a productive discussion about mental illness with those opinions, even harder when you consider the forum (not this actual forum, but a football message board in general).
There are some VERY VERY disturbing reports and photos circulating around with him in them..
Let's just say the world is likely better off now...
It's a shame you can't read, because Bourdain was pretty much an open book and he laid it all out on the page. If he's not who you thought he was, well, that's on you.
RE: Is there anyone out there who is on the same train Â
as I am where you are just so tired of hearing about 'mental illness'?
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here other than he was a guy who couldn't "cope with his demons".
If he was doing drugs, and that brought him to this "dark place: maybe he should've thought otherwise before using? He should've stuck it out for his family and their state of being comfortable with him in their world. That is sadly how I will be remembering him from this point on...
\
You are a very, very lost individual with a lot to learn about society and mental health.
It's actually upsetting to read a post like this. I don't know if you're trolling or what your angle here, but this stance is exactly the type that perpetuates the issue and why certain people feel like they can't open up about their issues. They worry that they'll be responded to like this.
Really terrible, and a very ignorant stance to take.
It's not productive for me to meet a POV like this with personal insults or name-calling, but it's truly astounding just how uneducated you come off here.
mental illness in this country that needs to be dealt with asap. The skyrocketing suicide rate, school shootings on a monthly basis, opioid addiction and much more. Blaming is easy and quick, from access to guns to video games to meds to social media - these are all contributing factors but its far more complex. Posting 1-800 hotline numbers isnt enough. Simple effective behavorial techniques need to be taught nationwide for free, similar to a CPR class.
Mental illness is such a broad and encompassing term. Â
with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
No one is claiming personal responsibility is suspended when someone is suffering from a mental illness. Virtually all treatment for mental illnesses aside from deep mental incompetence, includes a great deal of recognition and embracing of personal responsibility as part of a path toward wellness.
But taking responsibility on its own isn't going to cure someone suffering from the universally, medically accepted physiological impacts of mental illness.
And it certainly doesn't make the unimaginable suffering someone must be feeling to choose to die less horrible.
RE: RE: RE: Mental illness is such a broad and encompassing term. Â
with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
No one is claiming personal responsibility is suspended when someone is suffering from a mental illness. Virtually all treatment for mental illnesses aside from deep mental incompetence, includes a great deal of recognition and embracing of personal responsibility as part of a path toward wellness.
But taking responsibility on its own isn't going to cure someone suffering from the universally, medically accepted physiological impacts of mental illness.
And it certainly doesn't make the unimaginable suffering someone must be feeling to choose to die less horrible.
on this thread: "Virtually all treatment for mental illnesses aside from deep mental incompetence, includes a great deal of recognition and embracing of personal responsibility as part of a path toward wellness."
And I know this not because Ive read about it, but because i have lived and continue to live it every day, with the two people i love most in the world.
Quote:
it’s hardly an established regular practice.
Thing is, how much is it worth to you to take that chance?
My dish would have to be REALLY awful for me to do so, and in that case I'd probably just not eat it and refuse to pay for it.
I already said I don’t send food back unless it’s sometbjng completely wrong like ordering a steak and getting fish. If I asked for it medium rare and it’s medium well I will deal with it. My reasoning is that I don’t want to wait any longer, followed by the chance someone fucks with my food.
Quote:
In comment 13986973 UConn4523 said:
Quote:
it’s hardly an established regular practice.
Thing is, how much is it worth to you to take that chance?
My dish would have to be REALLY awful for me to do so, and in that case I'd probably just not eat it and refuse to pay for it.
I already said I don’t send food back unless it’s sometbjng completely wrong like ordering a steak and getting fish. If I asked for it medium rare and it’s medium well I will deal with it. My reasoning is that I don’t want to wait any longer, followed by the chance someone fucks with my food.
I bet it is rare for someone to mess with your food for sending back an obvious clear error. Where some people probably start doing things to return dishes is when it becomes subjective and poor reflection of their "skills".
I mean everyone almost. Very common.
Then, after work....dancing in nightclubs or watching live bands in nightclubs until 3 am 3 nights a week if not more.
Long Island was nightclubs - end to end.
Looking back, in some ways, it was horrible, once the edgy vibe wore off and the booze and drugs took their toll. And a world in which certain types of characters thrived in...you can imagine.
NYC, Cape Cod, places bourdain fell into, similar. Edgy. Music everywhere.
Before MTV, or any it's inception and before the internet, when there was still a huge staple of music - not played on the radio; Music Only found in clubs or on turntables, you felt as if you were carving out something new.
Rents were still cheap. Tribeca still had UN converted factory lofts. Empty. Frigging empty.
Cops were still allowed to give you a nice beat down.
People said that the 80s had greed. But that was a lifestyle option then, not a rule like now.
We had loose cash in our pockets and spent it all at night, each week. Why? I have no fucking idea.
I feel like I lost an old friend.
I hope he finds his peace...he brought a lot of joy to many people
It's so easy to forget how strong the pull of that life is for teens. And it's easy to overlook that booze and dope can freeze you in it FOREVER.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
lono801 : 6:45 pm : link : reply
And eat my first durian...
I hope he finds his peace...he brought a lot of joy to many people
More power to you!
Durian, sea cucumber and Vegomite are on the very short list of things I will never ingest again. I'll happily take a bite of Balut, with hot sauce and salt before lettin those other ingredients touch my tongue!!
By the way, unless I have a situation like steve in ky did with a raw piece of chicken, I will NEVER send food back. You can look at it as a cliche, I will not. Know too many people who say otherwise, including some fairly notable chefs.
I’m a gamer...I’ll jump into the deep end food wise.
No way I could do balut...
Dorian I actually liked...
Oh well ... still alive. I think I'll have something else next time though.
Some rumored stories about Azerbaijan being responsible from Russian/Israeli blogger Alexander Lapshin.
Lapshin, who was sentenced to three years in prison by Azerbaijan for having entered the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh claimed Bourdain's death not a suicide.
Bourdain was officially blacklisted by Azerbaijan after filming the show in Nagorno-Karabakh. Azerbaijan declared Bourdain persona non grata in November of 2017.
Quote:
seems like these cases get swept aside. There is a weird pattern of this going on in the last year.
Some rumored stories about Azerbaijan being responsible from Russian/Israeli blogger Alexander Lapshin.
Lapshin, who was�sentenced to three years in prison by Azerbaijan�for having entered the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh claimed Bourdain's death not a suicide.
Bourdain was officially blacklisted by Azerbaijan after filming the show in Nagorno-Karabakh. Azerbaijan declared Bourdain persona non grata in November of 2017.
Quote:
�Do you think this is connected somehow to his movie about Karabakh and Armenia? This man was widely criticized by Azerbaijan authorities because of that. Btw, just recently I have published the article in Le Monde called "Azerbaijani regime kidnaps and kills anyone it dislikes" and few days later this guy is gone by "suicide". Just short remind - they called an attempt of my murder in Baku prison as "suicide" as well) p.s Anton Nosik, the well known Russian journalist "suddenly" gone after his Karabakh visit as well, not to mention that Azerbaijan threatened him as well�, Lapshin said on Facebook after news on Bourdain�s death began emerging.
pretty hard to stage a hanging.
Quote:
He inspired me to search for
lono801 : 6:45 pm : link : reply
And eat my first durian...
I hope he finds his peace...he brought a lot of joy to many people
More power to you!
Durian, sea cucumber and Vegomite are on the very short list of things I will never ingest again. I'll happily take a bite of Balut, with hot sauce and salt before lettin those other ingredients touch my tongue!!
By the way, unless I have a situation like steve in ky did with a raw piece of chicken, I will NEVER send food back. You can look at it as a cliche, I will not. Know too many people who say otherwise, including some fairly notable chefs.
Definitely no to Balut...my first experienced involved a beak and some feathers. Stinky tofu is the other absolute never again. I love durian and durian smoothies.
Awful shit
Quote:
Anyone who calls this "selfish" really just doesn't understand depression and mental illness. I'm sorry.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
A point often missed. From just a very basic physiology, we've evolved to survive. To stray from that just logically requires quite a difference in the make-up of the person and the level of pain involved must be extraordinary.
Otherwise, never, ever, ever send anything back in a restaurant. Ever. And certainly, not because you think it was cooked 'wrong'. If you do that, might as well go lick the toilet yourself and eliminate the middle man.
You do have to hope you have a really young chick though. I've had ones that basically the lifeforms are just a little of texture, nothing with beaks and feathers.
Quote:
In comment 13986475 arcarsenal said:
Quote:
Anyone who calls this "selfish" really just doesn't understand depression and mental illness. I'm sorry.
I don't think you guys can comprehend how terrible depression can make you feel and how horrible life can seem to those suffering. You aren't capable of considering even the closest people in your life. It's easy on the outside to say "what a selfish prick! How could he leave a kid behind like that!"
It's just way, way off-target.
Sometimes the lows get so low that you just think the world would be a better place without you in it. It has nothing to do with being selfish. It's really fucking sad and I wish people would learn more about mental health and how it can affect people because comments like that are very ignorant.
I have not read every post so this is not directed at anyone in particular. But, as I said in the Kate Spade thread (celebrities killing themselves seem to be in vogue these days - sadly) ... I have dealt with clinical depression on and off since I was a teenager. So, in many ways I feel grateful that my pain does not seem to compare to people who are rich, famous, and have children .... and stiillll kill themselves. How come the people who are quick to condemn don't say -
"Holy crap, with all he had going for himself/herself .. that must have been real hell he was going through to choose death over a "charmed" life?"
I don't get it. When does the benefit of the doubt come into play?
A point often missed. From just a very basic physiology, we've evolved to survive. To stray from that just logically requires quite a difference in the make-up of the person and the level of pain involved must be extraordinary.
Christian - This might be an "apples to oranges" comparison but, remember 911? When those people were jumping off the floors that were on fire? There was probably very little thought going on in their heads. At that point when the jumped they were only thinking of one thing - survival. They were in heat that was so intolerable that they were looking for an escape (probably without thought) and they just jumped to escape the flames. Because they knew they were not going to survive the flames. It was an adrenaline reaction.
If a person was never in that kind of situation (I was. It was not 911 - but it was either react immediately or die and you don't think about what awaits - you are just trying to get out of the way of the moving train (going 70 miles per hour) that is 10 ft behind you).
Okay, maybe some of these folks - Kate Spade, Tony B., Kurt Cobain, Robin Williams, etc ..) felt emotionally the same way? It was their last choice. Most people (including myself, btw) won't understand it completely - but, I (because of my own experiences) will never judge.
You DO NOT kill yourself with an 11 year old daughter to leave behind. That is the most selfish, pathetic thing in the world. If you have the mental wherewithal to want to have a family, I am sorry, you have to fulfill that duty. Pathetic.
Did your oh-so-wise pappy also teach you that it is tasteless to speak ill of the dead? Especially in the immediate aftermath? I mean since we are getting on our high horses and all I should point out that you're coming off as a classless prick.
You also lack knowledge of mental illness, but I suppose that's true of many things.
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here other than he was a guy who couldn't "cope with his demons".
If he was doing drugs, and that brought him to this "dark place: maybe he should've thought otherwise before using? He should've stuck it out for his family and their state of being comfortable with him in their world. That is sadly how I will be remembering him from this point on...
When you're contemplating how many ignorant people there are in the world, never bet the under.
Let's just say the world is likely better off now...
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here...
Is there anyone around on the same train as me where you are just so tired about hearing about "cancer?"
Seriously, fuck you and fuck your dead father. Maybe it's best he's not around to be a judgemental fucktard anymore.
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as I am where you are just so tired of hearing about 'mental illness'?
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here...
Is there anyone around on the same train as me where you are just so tired about hearing about "cancer?"
Seriously, fuck you and fuck your dead father. Maybe it's best he's not around to be a judgemental fucktard anymore.
If the goal is to change peoples perception about mental illness and remove the stigma and preconceived notions about weakness, this probably isnt the best way to go about it.
And thats not even considering the troll angle.
If the goal is to change peoples perception about mental illness and remove the stigma and preconceived notions about weakness, this probably isnt the best way to go about it.
And thats not even considering the troll angle.
Hey, I'm sorry for the tone of my post. And I'm sorry I made it personal. It's not.
And the goal wasn't to change people's perceptions. Only to point out the fact that mental illmess IS AN (actually a broad spectrum of) ILLNESS(es).
Issues like weakness are irrelevant.
When it comes to their illesses, the ill don't have a whole lot of control when it comes to other people's perceptions. Might as well blame cancer on the victims' own bad attitudes.
My own sister died of cancer before her 51st birthday. And there's mental illness in my family too. I wasn't trying to do something grand. I responded to a post that pissed me off for it's judgementalism and hypocrisy and I took my anger out on the poster instead of the post.
So I apologise for the tone and personal nature of my attack.
But not for the idea that cancer sufferers are just as worthy of scorn and vitriol as the mentally ill.
Fuck the poster's "tired of hearing about the 'mentally ill' train."
That stands.
Let's just say the world is likely better off now...
It's a shame you can't read, because Bourdain was pretty much an open book and he laid it all out on the page. If he's not who you thought he was, well, that's on you.
As for my father, he lost his battle to cancer. That was the end of him He fought very hard until the end. He didn't take no easy way out. Again, if Bourdain was "mentally ill" he shouldn't have had kids in the first place and he would never be crossing a bridge where he would leave his daughter behind. My father would not feel an ounce of sadness for someone who took their own life, just the family. Sorry, it's just the correct way of thinking. Not much to understand here other than he was a guy who couldn't "cope with his demons".
If he was doing drugs, and that brought him to this "dark place: maybe he should've thought otherwise before using? He should've stuck it out for his family and their state of being comfortable with him in their world. That is sadly how I will be remembering him from this point on...
You are a very, very lost individual with a lot to learn about society and mental health.
It's actually upsetting to read a post like this. I don't know if you're trolling or what your angle here, but this stance is exactly the type that perpetuates the issue and why certain people feel like they can't open up about their issues. They worry that they'll be responded to like this.
Really terrible, and a very ignorant stance to take.
It's not productive for me to meet a POV like this with personal insults or name-calling, but it's truly astounding just how uneducated you come off here.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
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with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
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In comment 13988106 madgiantscow009 said:
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with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
No one is claiming personal responsibility is suspended when someone is suffering from a mental illness. Virtually all treatment for mental illnesses aside from deep mental incompetence, includes a great deal of recognition and embracing of personal responsibility as part of a path toward wellness.
But taking responsibility on its own isn't going to cure someone suffering from the universally, medically accepted physiological impacts of mental illness.
And it certainly doesn't make the unimaginable suffering someone must be feeling to choose to die less horrible.
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In comment 13988106 madgiantscow009 said:
Quote:
with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
They are when they reflect ignorance of this magnitude.
You're another person on this thread that has a lot to learn about mental health. I don't think depression is what you think it is.
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In comment 13988109 arcarsenal said:
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In comment 13988106 madgiantscow009 said:
Quote:
with anthony bourdain, personal responsibility was a major factor unless he was suffering from a form of psychosis.
And you know this how, exactly? Were you close with him? Did you evaluate him professionally?
Some of the comments on this thread are absolutely dumbfounding.
He chose to kill himself. Personal responsibility is not a dirty pair of words.
No one is claiming personal responsibility is suspended when someone is suffering from a mental illness. Virtually all treatment for mental illnesses aside from deep mental incompetence, includes a great deal of recognition and embracing of personal responsibility as part of a path toward wellness.
But taking responsibility on its own isn't going to cure someone suffering from the universally, medically accepted physiological impacts of mental illness.
And it certainly doesn't make the unimaginable suffering someone must be feeling to choose to die less horrible.
I agree.
And I know this not because Ive read about it, but because i have lived and continue to live it every day, with the two people i love most in the world.
More people die of suicides every year now - than they do in car accidents. And, around 50,000 people die every year from car accidents.
IMO, that is a lot of suicides.