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NFT: Costs Incurred With Friend Cancelling Euro Trip 2 Weeks Away

DaddyM89 : 9/9/2019 11:40 pm
Hey guys,

Off topic but curious for some insight. Have an Amsterdam and Munich (Oktoberfest) trip planned in a few weeks for my 30th birthday. Have a bunch of buddies meeting in Munich for Oktoberfest portion, but the one friend who was supposed to be on both legs now has to cancel the trip because he broke his foot this weekend. He broke it being a drunk asshole and kicking a wall and is getting surgery on his foot.

Now he wants me to split the costs of cancelling the hotel and the new arrangements I have to make are going to be about $300 more. All in all its probably going to cost me like 500-600 more and now being alone for the first leg of the trip. Am I wrong in thinking he should at least pay the couple hundred dollars for cancelling other hotel? I could understand if he had cancelled because of a medical emergency or family death etc, but I feel like I'm being punished for him being an idiot when he's drunk.

He's a pretty good friend so don't wanna ruin the friendship but also pretty pissed about the whole situation. Any feedback much appreciated!
You're dealing with someone dumb enough to break his own damn  
jcn56 : 9/9/2019 11:44 pm : link
foot by kicking something when he was drunk.

My opinion is if you find common ground on anything with this person you might want to rethink your position.
is your  
AndyMilligan : 9/10/2019 12:00 am : link
friend 12 years old? Or 16 years old? If he is an adult and broke his foot in this manner he needs some serious psychological help. Sure ask him for the money.. you don't need a friend like this...
He's the one canceling  
Sneakers O'toole : 9/10/2019 12:00 am : link
He should have to pay those costs. You're still going, you should have to pay whatever cost new arrangements call for IMO.
I donít understand why your new arrangements have gone up  
MetsAreBack : 9/10/2019 12:21 am : link
If heís not there. One would be downsizing, not upsizing. Or keeping the existing Rez if thatís the option.

I know itís tough for younger people with generally less money - but ruining friendships over $300 isnít worth it when you look back on life. At least he offered to split - take the long view and move on.
RE: I donít understand why your new arrangements have gone up  
Mike from SI : 9/10/2019 12:39 am : link
In comment 14569697 MetsAreBack said:
Quote:
If heís not there. One would be downsizing, not upsizing. Or keeping the existing Rez if thatís the option.

I know itís tough for younger people with generally less money - but ruining friendships over $300 isnít worth it when you look back on life. At least he offered to split - take the long view and move on.


I agree with this.

Btw, I did 3 nights in Amsterdam solo in July and it was amazing. For like 3 or 4 days it has a great amount of culture to do just about everything and go out at night. I did stay in a hostel so that I could find groups to do shit with (even though I could afford a hotel). Van Gogh museum is a must: you can do the whole thing in like 2ish hours, which is nice. Van Rijks museum is also amazing but that thing is big. They are outlawing walking tours of the red light district in 2020, so do one of those--you really get to hear about it from all different perspectives.

Amsterdam isn't really known for it's food (for good reason), but if you like meat, go to Cafe de Kloss. It's amazing. The rest of the food I ate there was pretty meh tbh.

In any event, if you don't mind traveling alone, it's a pretty cool place to do so.
2 questions  
Matt M. : 9/10/2019 6:04 am : link
One, why in the world would you cover any of the costs involved with him cancelling? Two, why would you need to make any new arranvements incurring an additional $300?
So if I understand correctly  
bhill410 : 9/10/2019 6:26 am : link
You are cancelling hotel to try and find one more affordable because you were originally going to split the cost. Couple follow ups - usually changing hotel res this far out is free, but that could be different in Europe. If you have to cancel whatís the fee? Second, is there a way to call hotel and see if there are cheaper rooms? Guessing not but sometimes they will have a weird one available especially in Europe.

To points mentioned about, this is a pretty annoying situation that you now have to not only incur more charges but also deal with being solo. That said in 10 years are you going to value that 500 dollars or friendship more?
That friend  
Les in TO : 9/10/2019 6:53 am : link
Had a lot of balls asking you to eat the cancellation fee because of his stupidity. He needs to pay it all.
F that.  
SFGFNCGiantsFan : 9/10/2019 6:58 am : link
You shouldn't be splitting the cancellation fee. It's his own damn fault he broke his freaking foot when drunk.
Sounds like you are more pissed that your friend is an idiot  
figgy2989 : 9/10/2019 7:01 am : link
Who hurt himself being, well, an idiot.

If this is a real good friend of yours, sit down with him and in a friendly/joking manner let him know how much his stupidity is costing you. If you have a good relationship, he should be willing to give you some money to offset any increased fees. Unless he is an absolute cheapskate, he is going to be saving money by not going on the trip and since it is your Birthday and you let him know how much it meant to you, he should have no problem forking over some dough.

As many have said above, if you both value the friendship over any monetary issue, there should be an understanding that you come up with.

Good luck.
Why do you need new arrangements?  
ron mexico : 9/10/2019 7:24 am : link
Why canít you just keep your current cookings?

Also whose credit card is everything on?
You can't fly with a broken foot now?  
Prude : 9/10/2019 7:29 am : link
The TSA is wildin.

Regardless the kid is a douchebag. He should be apologizing, not asking for reinbursement. People saying that a friendship isn't worth 300$ I would disagree completely. Getting away from this loser leech of a friend for free is a godsend.
Ditch the friendship  
Mike in NY : 9/10/2019 7:36 am : link
He is a leech if he is not willing to cover the costs of paying all cancellation fees. That being said, what is the increased hotel cost about? Were you going to split a room and now you are not? If so, a friend would contribute to that.

I canít help but think of the scene from A Bronx Tale when Sonny gives C advice after seeing the guy who owed C money.
On top  
Les in TO : 9/10/2019 8:10 am : link
Of paying all of the cancellation fee, he also owes you a steak dinner + stripper night for ruining your vacation
"A friend in need  
Heisenberg : 9/10/2019 8:12 am : link
is an asshole indeed."


This guy sucks.
Friend  
TyreeHelmet : 9/10/2019 8:30 am : link
Has to cover his costs. He made the mistake and he has to pay for it. Be reasonable with him and maybe try to find middle ground, but he committed to the trip and needs to pay. Put it this way, if you werenít involved and he was dealing directly with the hotel/ airline, he would be responsible. Shouldnít be any different with you.
My old man (44 y/o) rant  
penkap75 : 9/10/2019 8:45 am : link
You millenials are idiots.

Probably don't even have retirement savings but hey at least you get to go to Europe, YOLO!
RE: I donít understand why your new arrangements have gone up  
Mike from Ohio : 9/10/2019 8:57 am : link
In comment 14569697 MetsAreBack said:
Quote:
If heís not there. One would be downsizing, not upsizing. Or keeping the existing Rez if thatís the option.

I know itís tough for younger people with generally less money - but ruining friendships over $300 isnít worth it when you look back on life. At least he offered to split - take the long view and move on.


^^^This is good advice.
Doesnít this discussion belong somewhere else? NFT !!!  
Ivan15 : 9/10/2019 9:01 am : link
Another millennial who doesnít think any rules apply to him.
RE: Doesnít this discussion belong somewhere else? NFT !!!  
JayBinQueens : 9/10/2019 9:02 am : link
In comment 14569862 Ivan15 said:
Quote:
Another millennial who doesnít think any rules apply to him.


Lol - another old man who can't read. It is an NFT...
Not sure why he thinks you should split the costs of cancelling  
WideRight : 9/10/2019 9:08 am : link
That's on him. He could also try to get a medical exception to the cancellation costs rather than dumping it on you.

But all the other costs are on you
Its your birthday trip, hes screwing it up,  
j_rud : 9/10/2019 9:17 am : link
and he wants you to help pay for it? You need a new friend, this guy sounds like a stupid, selfish jackass.
RE:  
ron mexico : 9/10/2019 9:19 am : link
In comment 14569805 Heisenberg said:
Quote:
is an asshole indeed."


This guy sucks.


.....a friend with weed is better.


can anyone name that song?

Has DaddyM89  
figgy2989 : 9/10/2019 9:27 am : link
Even responded to this thread?

MAB pointed it out above, if everything is already booked as far as hotels, what exactly are you being hit with if he backs out? Did you pay for his airline ticket with your CC?
Your friend is cheap as hell  
ELI THE GOAT : 9/10/2019 9:43 am : link
And you need to reexamine your friendship with him.

Go to Amsterdam be yourself and enjoy the RLD without any of gossip coming back to the States lol , live it up young man
....  
BrettNYG10 : 9/10/2019 9:45 am : link
Why do you think anyone on BBI has friends?
This a very simple answer...  
BC Eagles94 : 9/10/2019 9:53 am : link
Any cancellation costs, that is 100% on him. Any increase in costs now that you are travelling alone, that is on you. Sucks, but what can you do. Shit happens and people have to bail on trips sometimes. The good thing is you still get to go, maybe you even find someone to join you. But you shouldn't pay a penny for any cancellation charges.
I don't get it  
SomeFan : 9/10/2019 11:07 am : link
Why would you pay any of his costs if he is cancelling?
RE: 2 questions  
SomeFan : 9/10/2019 11:09 am : link
In comment 14569739 Matt M. said:
Quote:
One, why in the world would you cover any of the costs involved with him cancelling? Two, why would you need to make any new arranvements incurring an additional $300?


And this
you grown men sharing rooms too?  
mdc1 : 9/10/2019 6:16 pm : link
good grief, each person pay for or loss their own shit.
RE: RE:  
djm : 9/10/2019 7:51 pm : link
In comment 14569905 ron mexico said:
Quote:
In comment 14569805 Heisenberg said:


Quote:


is an asshole indeed."


This guy sucks.



.....a friend with weed is better.


can anyone name that song?


Damnit I know the song but donít know the name. Came out in the 90s.

Pure morning!
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