All, you may recall, BeezKids are older now (21 and 19 - time flies). But a friend confided in me today about a thing he’s dealing with, concerning his 7-year-old son. I’d never dealt with this with our kids and I tried looking things up online but had no luck.
Here’s the deal. The boy, nice and normal kid, lately has begun telling his parents that he “doesn’t feel real.” I guess he can’t offer many details. They are perplexed. Considering a counselor. But he has a physical in a few weeks so they may wait to see what if anything pops up there.
Happy, average little guy. Nothing out of the ordinary, really. At least obviously.
Thought I’d toss it to BBI, as this community typically will have sage advice.
Thanks all.
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Wants you discussing his kids issues in the internet?
Oh. You know them?
Nope don’t know em. I do know if I confided in a friend and he turned around and posted about it on the internet, I’d be pretty pissed.
I also know if my wife found out one of my idiot friends posted about her son on the internet, she would go fucking ballistic and probably murder both of us.
Your mileage may vary.
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In comment 14573472 ron mexico said:
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Wants you discussing his kids issues in the internet?
Oh. You know them?
Nope don’t know em. I do know if I confided in a friend and he turned around and posted about it on the internet, I’d be pretty pissed.
I also know if my wife found out one of my idiot friends posted about her son on the internet, she would go fucking ballistic and probably murder both of us.
Your mileage may vary.
Chill - its anonymous.
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In comment 14573630 Beezer said:
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In comment 14573472 ron mexico said:
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Wants you discussing his kids issues in the internet?
Oh. You know them?
Nope don’t know em. I do know if I confided in a friend and he turned around and posted about it on the internet, I’d be pretty pissed.
I also know if my wife found out one of my idiot friends posted about her son on the internet, she would go fucking ballistic and probably murder both of us.
Your mileage may vary.
Chill - its anonymous.
My response is half serious half joking.
We all know Beez is an oversharer. That’s fine for his own life but he shouldn’t make that decision for others. What possible good could come out of posting this? You think some stranger on a football message board is going to solve this? Is he going to go back to his friend and pass on wisdom he got from Deeznutz69420?
So, no, probably not solving, but at least sharing similar experiences that can be helpful.
And no one knows who this kid is, so I'm pretty sure the mother killing anyone for sharing details about her son is unlikely.
I get tons of travel advice on here, restaurants, smoking, obviously sports (including fantasy football), gardening, home improvement, landscaping, and more.
Lost in this discussion about Beezer possibly violating the confidentiality of his friend is the fact that we just had a Shepherdsam sighting!
I haven't seen sam post in a while, so it's great to see his presence again.
So, no, probably not solving, but at least sharing similar experiences that can be helpful.
And no one knows who this kid is, so I'm pretty sure the mother killing anyone for sharing details about her son is unlikely.
I get tons of travel advice on here, restaurants, smoking, obviously sports (including fantasy football), gardening, home improvement, landscaping, and more.
Sure, but he is not asking for his own kid, it’s not like can use any of the advice given.
And for science purposes, run this scenario past your wife and see if she would be fine with one of your buddy’s posting anonymously about your kids on the internet and see if she would be fine with it.
Maybe I’m the outlier here.
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but you'd be surprised the things on here that others have experienced and can provide valuable advice to others.
So, no, probably not solving, but at least sharing similar experiences that can be helpful.
And no one knows who this kid is, so I'm pretty sure the mother killing anyone for sharing details about her son is unlikely.
I get tons of travel advice on here, restaurants, smoking, obviously sports (including fantasy football), gardening, home improvement, landscaping, and more.
Sure, but he is not asking for his own kid, it’s not like can use any of the advice given.
And for science purposes, run this scenario past your wife and see if she would be fine with one of your buddy’s posting anonymously about your kids on the internet and see if she would be fine with it.
Maybe I’m the outlier here.
no one knows me on here except my brother and he rarely posts anymore and no one knows who he is.
I am confident though because my wife is a rational person, she would not care if I anonymously ask a group of anonymous people about my anonymous child who is exhibiting strange behavior.
Plus I've done much worse than that anyway (we've been married 20 years) and she hasn't killed me.
She still cool with that?
No problem with that at all.
She still cool with that?
Zero issue with it. In that case it's even more removed from anyone identifying me or my child. and if I was that concerned with privacy I probably wouldn't ask anyone other than a doctor.
but if I mentioned the situation to a buddy and he, anonymously asked an anonymous group of Giants fans on an internet message board about a situation with my anonymous child in an effort to help get me good advice, no issues whatsoever.
what do you envision being the danger? Beez' friends why doing a google search and seeing an anonymous post by some guy with a user name Beezer on a Giants message board asking about a situation that sounds a lot like our son? HOW DARE YOU?
I think you are overreacting.
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In comment 14573687 ron mexico said:
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In comment 14573630 Beezer said:
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In comment 14573472 ron mexico said:
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Wants you discussing his kids issues in the internet?
Oh. You know them?
Nope don’t know em. I do know if I confided in a friend and he turned around and posted about it on the internet, I’d be pretty pissed.
I also know if my wife found out one of my idiot friends posted about her son on the internet, she would go fucking ballistic and probably murder both of us.
Your mileage may vary.
Chill - its anonymous.
My response is half serious half joking.
We all know Beez is an oversharer. That’s fine for his own life but he shouldn’t make that decision for others. What possible good could come out of posting this? You think some stranger on a football message board is going to solve this? Is he going to go back to his friend and pass on wisdom he got from Deeznutz69420?
Dammit, Simo is reading this and is registering the handle in his Rolodex of Dupes.
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tell him to stop watching/reading the news.
Lost in this discussion about Beezer possibly violating the confidentiality of his friend is the fact that we just had a Shepherdsam sighting!
I haven't seen sam post in a while, so it's great to see his presence again.
Thanks to a few of you folks who aren't AGHAST at this horrifying breach by me. I do appreciate the link(s) and other ideas.
And FWIW, I occasionally wonder if the world isn't a SIM. Some stuff just seems too bizarre to be real.
Thanks to a few of you folks who aren't AGHAST at this horrifying breach by me. I do appreciate the link(s) and other ideas.
Probably because most of the personal stuff posted is actually, well... personal. Not about someone else's 7 year old.
Kind of a weird thing to seek opinions on given it's a predominantly sports-oriented board. I know we have a lot of miscellaneous stuff here, but... I kinda am with mexico on this. If it were my kid, I wouldn't be thrilled that one of my supposed friends was seeking counsel regarding my childs behavior unsolicited on a public football message board.
Maybe just worry about your own and let these parents handle their child however they see fit.
In comment 14573635 flycatcher said:
Sometimes the awareness that it’s just a passing symptom will help the afflicted to worry less about it, which can help to break the anxiety loop,
Hope the kid feels better Link - ( New Window )
Let's say you get sage advice from BBI. How do you then work that into a follow-up conversation without exposing that you violated your friend's confidentiality?
Minor pitfalls of being an attention whore - but a pitfall nonetheless......
That someone offered a link that could be useful might be something I could share.
My middle Son, then about 8 years old (now 30) displayed similar feelings of dis-association. He had attention problems and while not debilitating or extreme we wanted to be 'good', 'proactive' parents.
At the advice of some of his teachers, we took him to a pediatrician. After what I considered a very modest examination, he ordered a cocktail of drugs, including Ritalin. He also suggested getting help from a child psychologist. We did this.
We drugged the crap out of our kid and ran him through at least 3 different psychologists. We got dragged along this path, because we wanted to be those good parents. Our pediatrician said to keep working on it and it could be a lifetime thing. Meanwhile I learned the hard way that psychologists are the most screwed-up people on the planet. This was like pouring gasoline on a fire.
Fast forward to about 2 months ago. Ironic to your thread, I'm talking to my Son on the phone (he lives in Philadelphia) and having a discussion about his childhood. He hits me with a spear in the heart by saying that the 2-3 years that he spent on the drugs and the parade of whacky psychologists had led to a lot of his adolescent problems. He had drug dependency issues and had a lot of problems coping through high school. We worked through all of this, but it took a very heavy toll on all of us. Thankfully, he got his act together, graduated from college and is very well adjusted. But... it took a mountain of work by him to overcome his 'good' parents.
If I could go back in time, I would ride-out the problems my Son displayed. The more I thought about what he said, the more stupid I felt. I saw what a crap-show this time was, but I put blind faith in something that I should have been smarter about. Now... I'd talk his through it and give him love and comfort. My advice to your friend is to be VERY cautious of drugs and psychologists. For my family, the cure was far worse than the illness!
True story. She's 16 now. Maybe in 10 years or so... my wife might really kill me for that.. might make national news though.
My middle Son, then about 8 years old (now 30) displayed similar feelings of dis-association. He had attention problems and while not debilitating or extreme we wanted to be 'good', 'proactive' parents.
At the advice of some of his teachers, we took him to a pediatrician. After what I considered a very modest examination, he ordered a cocktail of drugs, including Ritalin. He also suggested getting help from a child psychologist. We did this.
We drugged the crap out of our kid and ran him through at least 3 different psychologists. We got dragged along this path, because we wanted to be those good parents. Our pediatrician said to keep working on it and it could be a lifetime thing. Meanwhile I learned the hard way that psychologists are the most screwed-up people on the planet. This was like pouring gasoline on a fire.
Fast forward to about 2 months ago. Ironic to your thread, I'm talking to my Son on the phone (he lives in Philadelphia) and having a discussion about his childhood. He hits me with a spear in the heart by saying that the 2-3 years that he spent on the drugs and the parade of whacky psychologists had led to a lot of his adolescent problems. He had drug dependency issues and had a lot of problems coping through high school. We worked through all of this, but it took a very heavy toll on all of us. Thankfully, he got his act together, graduated from college and is very well adjusted. But... it took a mountain of work by him to overcome his 'good' parents.
If I could go back in time, I would ride-out the problems my Son displayed. The more I thought about what he said, the more stupid I felt. I saw what a crap-show this time was, but I put blind faith in something that I should have been smarter about. Now... I'd talk his through it and give him love and comfort. My advice to your friend is to be VERY cautious of drugs and psychologists. For my family, the cure was far worse than the illness!
Bama, it's not your fault. You did nothing other than what you thought was best, while you yourself were stressed out and probably at wit's end. Your good parenting outweighs your mistakes by tons.
What happens if you google "Kid says: "I don't feel real"??
206 Million links appear.
But the kids parents did not think of that
But the answer is a benevolent friends goes to BBI
Only to learn there are 206,000,000 links to articles on exactly this subject.
Who's zommin Who?
Hope you are well
" what to do about it?"
" why is my kid saying this?"
" is it common?"
So all in all about 500,000,000 links one click away from any parents fingers. Lets assume 100,000 of them are useful
and then there is BBI as a source as well
Kid feels like he 'isn't real'?
Good! He's perceptive!
If you wake up one morning and find all the knives from your kitchen arranged around your bed, blades pointing to you (this happened to someone I knew years ago, 3rd-hand) THEN get help.
Otherwise, just ride it out like the rest of us. We grow out of most of our odd childhood behavior.
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
It doesn't really matter, it's just principle.
If it were my kid, I wouldn't be thrilled with one of my friends asking for 'advice' regarding their behavior on a public internet forum when I didn't ask them to do that.
Is it a big deal? No. Is there any point to this thread? What's the endgame here? Is Beez going to go back to these people and say "hey, I thought your kid was saying some weird shit, so I sought advice on a football message board and here's what I learned..."
I'm guessing that wouldn't go over all that well.
If the actual parents want advice for their own child, they can seek it on their own. I'm not sure what Beez has to gain here or how this possibly helps the child who probably doesn't even have anything wrong with him.
We've got a bunch of people trying to psychoanalyze a 7 year old child because he said he doesn't feel real.
Kids say weird things! I don't think they need to sound the alarms here and I'm sure they don't need a friend posting about their child's problems on a sports message board - anonymous or not.
My middle Son, then about 8 years old (now 30) displayed similar feelings of dis-association. He had attention problems and while not debilitating or extreme we wanted to be 'good', 'proactive' parents.
At the advice of some of his teachers, we took him to a pediatrician. After what I considered a very modest examination, he ordered a cocktail of drugs, including Ritalin. He also suggested getting help from a child psychologist. We did this.
We drugged the crap out of our kid and ran him through at least 3 different psychologists. We got dragged along this path, because we wanted to be those good parents. Our pediatrician said to keep working on it and it could be a lifetime thing. Meanwhile I learned the hard way that psychologists are the most screwed-up people on the planet. This was like pouring gasoline on a fire.
Fast forward to about 2 months ago. Ironic to your thread, I'm talking to my Son on the phone (he lives in Philadelphia) and having a discussion about his childhood. He hits me with a spear in the heart by saying that the 2-3 years that he spent on the drugs and the parade of whacky psychologists had led to a lot of his adolescent problems. He had drug dependency issues and had a lot of problems coping through high school. We worked through all of this, but it took a very heavy toll on all of us. Thankfully, he got his act together, graduated from college and is very well adjusted. But... it took a mountain of work by him to overcome his 'good' parents.
If I could go back in time, I would ride-out the problems my Son displayed. The more I thought about what he said, the more stupid I felt. I saw what a crap-show this time was, but I put blind faith in something that I should have been smarter about. Now... I'd talk his through it and give him love and comfort. My advice to your friend is to be VERY cautious of drugs and psychologists. For my family, the cure was far worse than the illness!
Thanks Bama. I'm glad your son is doing well. I appreciate you sharing your story.
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it's not personal information if there is no person identified.
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
It doesn't really matter, it's just principle.
If it were my kid, I wouldn't be thrilled with one of my friends asking for 'advice' regarding their behavior on a public internet forum when I didn't ask them to do that.
Is it a big deal? No. Is there any point to this thread? What's the endgame here? Is Beez going to go back to these people and say "hey, I thought your kid was saying some weird shit, so I sought advice on a football message board and here's what I learned..."
I'm guessing that wouldn't go over all that well.
If the actual parents want advice for their own child, they can seek it on their own. I'm not sure what Beez has to gain here or how this possibly helps the child who probably doesn't even have anything wrong with him.
We've got a bunch of people trying to psychoanalyze a 7 year old child because he said he doesn't feel real.
Kids say weird things! I don't think they need to sound the alarms here and I'm sure they don't need a friend posting about their child's problems on a sports message board - anonymous or not.
Bama's insight is worth all the crap some of you are wasting your time with.
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it's not personal information if there is no person identified.
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
FYI, I know Beez, and have no idea who the fuck he's talking about.
x ... I don't believe you know the family.
Oh Les ... you just never know. LOL
Hi RC, Hi Bill2!
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In comment 14574197 pjcas18 said:
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it's not personal information if there is no person identified.
Even the EU or CA wouldn't consider this protected information.
IT IS ANONYMOUS
It doesn't really matter, it's just principle.
If it were my kid, I wouldn't be thrilled with one of my friends asking for 'advice' regarding their behavior on a public internet forum when I didn't ask them to do that.
Is it a big deal? No. Is there any point to this thread? What's the endgame here? Is Beez going to go back to these people and say "hey, I thought your kid was saying some weird shit, so I sought advice on a football message board and here's what I learned..."
I'm guessing that wouldn't go over all that well.
If the actual parents want advice for their own child, they can seek it on their own. I'm not sure what Beez has to gain here or how this possibly helps the child who probably doesn't even have anything wrong with him.
We've got a bunch of people trying to psychoanalyze a 7 year old child because he said he doesn't feel real.
Kids say weird things! I don't think they need to sound the alarms here and I'm sure they don't need a friend posting about their child's problems on a sports message board - anonymous or not.
Bama's insight is worth all the crap some of you are wasting your time with.
It's not our fault you're a fucking weirdo, man.
Let me know what you're going to do with this important "insight" now. Go back and let them know you received "sage wisdom" on Big Blue Interactive and give them parenting advice?
Maybe just mind your own business and worry about your own kids. Just a thought.
Kid feels like he 'isn't real'?
Good! He's perceptive!
If you wake up one morning and find all the knives from your kitchen arranged around your bed, blades pointing to you (this happened to someone I knew years ago, 3rd-hand) THEN get help.
Otherwise, just ride it out like the rest of us. We grow out of most of our odd childhood behavior.
Creepy! Ted Bundy actually did that to a relation as a kid. That would be so damn spooky.
As for the issue at hand, it sounds like starting with the pediatrician since the physical is coming up is a good idea along with checking in with his teachers.