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| In the Giants' announcement of Nate Solder's nomination for the Walter Payton Man of the Year award, they revealed that his 4-year-old son recently underwent surgery to remove a tumor and is currently undergoing his third round of chemotherapy. He was first diagnosed at 3 months. |
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In comment 14715724 ECham said:
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he should go take care of his family, him playing is hurting the Giants, and cant be helping his family
I'm pretty sure the salary he's earning from the Giants is helping his family.
Had to fit a subtle dig in about his salary.
No amount of money can help his situation, a-hole.
It's not a subtle dig and as someone who has family members going through cancer right now, I can tell you having money absolutely matters. Agree I'm an a-hole, but my post was a dig at the poster who suggested Solder should stop playing and go be with his family - thus forfeiting his remaining salary.
Prayers to Nate, his boy and his whole family.
Good luck to the Solders, no child should have to go through this.
that shit doesnt care what nationality you are, what color skin, what race, class.... it will kill you and thats it.
we should fucking declare war on it! gets me so heated
Fuck cancer, btw.
Prayers for the Solder family and all others dealing with similar issues.
Fuck cancer, btw.
So...you have not hammered the guy? Huh...
Hang in there big fella and prayers sent!
I think it's ok to criticize, but at the same time it can be done respectfully recognizing that even wealthy athletes are human beings too with lives and emotions.
It was the big story on why his play dropped off his last year with the Pats. His son was diagnosed initially (IIRC) right before the season started. It adversely impacted his play until about midway through the season for them.
In April of 2018, 27 year old son was diagnosed with cancer. He notified me via Skype (I live in Korea) and I told him I'd be on the next plane out. "No sweat, dad, they're going to cut it out. You don't have to come."
Who am I to argue? Fast forward four months and I get an email reading simply, "We need to Skype." Talk about an adrenaline rush. I knew exactly what to expect. The cancer had metastasized to his lungs. We get on Skype.
Me: Do you want me to come, this time?
Him: Can you?
I was on the next plane out.
Three months of the roughest chemotherapy they could throw at him, because he's young and incredibly strong.
Week one: five days, eight hours a day.
Week two: one day, three hours
Week three: one day, three hours
This cycle was repeated four times.
His first day was spent hooked up to the chemo pump and he was puking his guts out. As I stood outside the restroom in case he needed anything, the tears were running down my face and I'm thinking,"Is every day going to be like this?"
A nurse saw me and said, "You okay?" I couldn't even talk. She gave me this big hug and said, "Make him eat, he'll be okay." That's all it took. My son was relatively fine after that.
About halfway through his treatments, we were sitting in a common chemo room and a guy who could have been in his 50s is hooked up next to us and he says to my son, "You're too young to be here." My son replies, "We're all too young to be here."
There were patients aged two to ninety in that place. It's particularly heartbreaking to see parents bringing their kids in.
After his treatments were finished, my son told me I could come back. I told him, "If you can put up with me for another couple of months, I'd like to stick around until your next scan comes back clean."
Sure enough, he was clean and I was able to return home six months to the day I went to Kansas where my son is a cop.
All the above, and there could be a lot more if I wanted to go into all the other complications there were involved, is my way of saying that I was completely preoccupied with my adult child who could easily communicate what was going on. Imagine if you've got a kid the age of Solder's son. I guarantee it's all he's thinking about.
It's why I don't really say much about Solder on here. Yeah he is stinking it up a bit now but I figured that has something to do with it and I have absolutely no desire to call someone out who is going through that.
Second, I've just come back from visiting my brother, who is undergoing cancer treatment for the second time. (It recurred exactly as predicted, five years after the end of the first treatment.) The treatments aren't too bad, his prognosis is excellent, and I'm not very worried about him — but yeah, it's a stressor and it's always in the back of my mind. And he's a grown man, and not my kid.
So while that doesn't give Solder a pass on the 2019 season, It sure as hell means we have nothing to be mad at him about. The fact he's able to play at all is freakin' heroic. Most of us would barely be able to focus while our kid was undergoing cancer treatment, let alone be a starting LT in the NFL.
Sending love.
It's why I don't really say much about Solder on here. Yeah he is stinking it up a bit now but I figured that has something to do with it and I have absolutely no desire to call someone out who is going through that.
Thanks, man. How's everything back in my home state of Connecticut?
It's rough, for sure. One thing I learned though, is that chemo nurses to a woman (and the one man we had) are the most compassionate people around. I hope Solder and his family are as lucky as we were in that regard.
And he earned via negiotiation. So keep it, be well and help the family heal. Nothing is more important.
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he should go take care of his family, him playing is hurting the Giants, and cant be helping his family
I'm pretty sure the salary he's earning from the Giants is helping his family.
Giants should pay him regardless and let him be with his family. There is no need for hi. to mop up the season
But a lot of the criticism of Solder has been born of frustration at the team overall.
Has Solder struggled in pass pro? Yes. But he has also been decent at other times and his run blocking has been fine.
He also has a revolving door at TE. Last game, he and Simonson crashed into one another and that's how Curry was able to break free. Even then Simonson had gone downfield and was wide open but Eli did not see him. Same thing happened earlier in the game with Smith.
So, you have to analyze the plays instead of just blaming Solder.
I'm sure he would be the first to say he has not played as well as he should have, but when you consider he is coming off surgery and what he has been going through with his son, I think he deserves better from the fans.
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That's rough, sorry bud.
It's why I don't really say much about Solder on here. Yeah he is stinking it up a bit now but I figured that has something to do with it and I have absolutely no desire to call someone out who is going through that.
Thanks, man. How's everything back in my home state of Connecticut?
It's rough, for sure. One thing I learned though, is that chemo nurses to a woman (and the one man we had) are the most compassionate people around. I hope Solder and his family are as lucky as we were in that regard.
Even before I got to your post, my 7 year old son is fine, but just the thought of him having to go through something like cancer and chemo made my eyes moisten.
Anybody having to endure it is heartbreaking and torturous.
Congratulations on your son's recovery, and the strength and love you brought to him to help him through. Best wishes that he remains healthy and cancer free.
In April of 2018, 27 year old son was diagnosed with cancer. He notified me via Skype (I live in Korea) and I told him I'd be on the next plane out. "No sweat, dad, they're going to cut it out. You don't have to come."
Who am I to argue? Fast forward four months and I get an email reading simply, "We need to Skype." Talk about an adrenaline rush. I knew exactly what to expect. The cancer had metastasized to his lungs. We get on Skype.
Me: Do you want me to come, this time?
Him: Can you?
I was on the next plane out.
Three months of the roughest chemotherapy they could throw at him, because he's young and incredibly strong.
Week one: five days, eight hours a day.
Week two: one day, three hours
Week three: one day, three hours
This cycle was repeated four times.
His first day was spent hooked up to the chemo pump and he was puking his guts out. As I stood outside the restroom in case he needed anything, the tears were running down my face and I'm thinking,"Is every day going to be like this?"
A nurse saw me and said, "You okay?" I couldn't even talk. She gave me this big hug and said, "Make him eat, he'll be okay." That's all it took. My son was relatively fine after that.
About halfway through his treatments, we were sitting in a common chemo room and a guy who could have been in his 50s is hooked up next to us and he says to my son, "You're too young to be here." My son replies, "We're all too young to be here."
There were patients aged two to ninety in that place. It's particularly heartbreaking to see parents bringing their kids in.
After his treatments were finished, my son told me I could come back. I told him, "If you can put up with me for another couple of months, I'd like to stick around until your next scan comes back clean."
Sure enough, he was clean and I was able to return home six months to the day I went to Kansas where my son is a cop.
All the above, and there could be a lot more if I wanted to go into all the other complications there were involved, is my way of saying that I was completely preoccupied with my adult child who could easily communicate what was going on. Imagine if you've got a kid the age of Solder's son. I guarantee it's all he's thinking about.
Thank you for sharing. I pray your son stays healthy. Thank you because we all need perspective.
Concentrating on your job no matter what it is is hard if not near impossible consistently. Good days are barely ok. Not good days( alot of them) you barely remember in retrospect anything of detail.
2.There's often no order to your days. Things change on a dime.
3. As hard as it is as a father here, you must also support your wife who has most of the immediate,day to day anxiety, and care of an unwell child to deal with. Alot of commiserating, and support. Of course we do it, but it is a further emotional drain.
4. There are days you can't seem to find any energy for anything- work ,event talking.
5.The pain of seeing your normal child unable to do normal things, be in pain, lose interest in things, realizing even if they survive they'll never be the same as they were, or have kids- hard to watch.
6.The helplessness of it all. As men, we like to solve problems. You can't fix this, or do anything to fix it . Just bear it for your child, and your family, just get through it.
7. Your relationship with your spouse often changes, and not always for the better. divorce rates after childhood deaths for instance are about 50%. Just too much shared pain.
Of course we fight, and do more than we think we are capable of, and are called courageous, and strong, but in reality? Just keeping it together 1 day, sometimes 1 shift at a time.
I will pray for all of them often this Christmas season.
God bless that little man.
As for Nate....it def is affecting him at the job
I have a young man who works for me. Six years ago his son of three was diagnosed with cancer. He was destroyed but remained working as that was his relief. It affected his performance on the job but I as well as the team understood and supported. There was a good end to this story as his son Neal is going strong, and kicked cancers ass and has been clean for 5 years.
I pray that Nate Solder sons has the same fate as Neal.
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That's rough, sorry bud.
It's why I don't really say much about Solder on here. Yeah he is stinking it up a bit now but I figured that has something to do with it and I have absolutely no desire to call someone out who is going through that.
Thanks, man. How's everything back in my home state of Connecticut?
It's rough, for sure. One thing I learned though, is that chemo nurses to a woman (and the one man we had) are the most compassionate people around. I hope Solder and his family are as lucky as we were in that regard.
CT is good. Expensive but good... lol. Thanks for sharing your story, hope all is well with you and yours! And I hope the Solders do have that same support for sure!
Still costs an arm and a leg to live there, or is it an arm and two legs, now? Hope things are good with your family also.
You know, just about everyone has a cancer story. Some hit closer to home than others. Everyone should realize though, that even after the treatment has ended and a patient is clear, there are still years of follow-up scans and blood work. The fact that the disease could return is always in the back of your mind.
As far as the Giants go, I'll repeat my mantra from the late 60s and 70s: We'll get 'em next year.
and that as much as we fight, bitch at and insult each other, this is the BBI community. Raultney all the best to your son and we all hope that he is now cancer free. Thanks for sharing.
Having sat with my wife as she got her multiple rounds of chemo and watched the others in the room trying to fight while holding back tears and sick stomachs I can only send prayers to the young Solder and family.
The journey is anything but “fun” but keep a strong heart and a“I can do it attitude” and trust that spiritual help will come your way. The little flower is strong!!!
If everyone that views BBI would - before viewing Giants posts -says a short prayer or sends a positive thoughts to the Solders that would help.
Eric can anchor a post for thoughts for the Solder family.
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he should go take care of his family, him playing is hurting the Giants, and cant be helping his family
I'm pretty sure the salary he's earning from the Giants is helping his family.
What a fucked up thing to say
What he is going through....is absolutely the worse thing possible for any father or parent.
Explains everything
I won't accuse you of being insensitive, but do you think you've thought this post through adequately?
To me it's not so clear what "do the right thing" you speak of is...
Should he have refused to sign with the Giants and made the whopping millions of dollars guaranteed that he was offered to sit by his son 24/7 and 365/365?
Would that have been the best thing for his family? For him?
He had a much better second half of the season last year than his first half, remember.
Option 2: after signing with the Giants and playing his first year with mixed results, then his son doesn't test clear and needs another round of chemo... Should he then sit out the season and take personal leave and forego his week to week paychecks? Should he tell his teammates "I'm out for now till my son gets better." He already has most of the guaranteed money, right? But is this best for him? For the team? For his relation with the team that maybe he wants to show that he was worth the multiple millions he negotiated for?
Is that the example he wants to set for his son? What about the dead cap money? Should he give his signing bonus back to the team? What message does that send to his son? When times are tough, pack it in?
I don't see any easy answer here among the options.
And what should Gettleman, a cancer survivor himself, advise him?
Wow, really no easy answers...