I noticed in the other thread almost all the lines were delivered by men. To be fair, I thought I'd start a thread for the best lines by women.
“get away from her you bitch”
“i volunteer as tribute”
“do you know what happens to toad when its stuck by lightning ? (pause) The same thing that happens to everything else”
“This will not be over quickly, You will not enjoy it. I am not your Queen”
“You’re not going to serve, You’re going to die”
"I gave my life to my children on a silver platter!" - Livia Soprano
Are you in show business shotzie?
Nope!
Then get your fwiggin' feet off the stage!!
nice job here
Wicked Witch of the West
Followed by the even better:
"I'll have what she's having"
"I don't like crooks. And if I did like 'em, I wouldn't like crooks that are stool pigeons. And if I did like crooks that are stool pigeons, I still wouldn't like you."
Makes me laugh every time I see that movie.
Also from Law and Order
Shambala Green:
"Jesuitical Casuistry!"
Followed by the even better:
"I'll have what she's having"
TL: "I don't go down"
-Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
-A Streetcar Named Desire
-Sunset Boulevard
Was that Rachel to Ross?
"And you blend"
“You had me at hello.”
“Or maybe just whistle. You know how to whistle, don’t you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow.”
“Life’s a bitch... Now so am I”
“Hey, Stud.”
“Nobody puts Baby in a corner.”
End of thread, IMO.
“Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope.”
and
“I know”.
But also, from “When Harry Met Sally...”:
“Everybody thinks they have good taste and a sense of humor but they couldn't possibly all have good taste.”
“I want you to know... that I will never want that wagon wheel coffee table.”
“Tell me I'll never have to be out there again.”
“Someone is staring at you in Personal Growth.”
“You're right, you're right. I know you're right.”
Quote:
and just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy and it is a big deal!
Was that Rachel to Ross?
Yes.
I knew it!
I’m melting, I’m melting!!
Ew, David!!
"I'll never kiss you again"
This destroys him. Great line and scene.
(or just about any other line she delivers in that scene)
Quote:
Imagine you’re a deer....
"And you blend"
Oh for me there's a brick shithouse full of great Marissa Time I quotes as the character Mona Lisa Whatever in My Cousin Vinny. The dialogue between her and Pesci over the dripping faucet in the hotel bathroom just kills me. Just paraphrasing now, but this:
MT: "It's broken."
JP: "How do you know it's broken? Maybe you just didn't tighten it enough?"
"I tightened it just right. I used a torque wrench and tightened it to exactly the correct lbs per sq in."
"How do you know the torque wrench was accurate?"
"Because it had just been calibrated by the official beaureau of weights and measures to be accurate."
"How accurate was it?"
"Dead on balls accurate!"
Quote:
In comment 14927048 mattlawson said:
Quote:
Imagine you’re a deer....
"And you blend"
Oh for me there's a brick shithouse full of great Marissa Time I quotes as the character Mona Lisa Whatever in My Cousin Vinny. The dialogue between her and Pesci over the dripping faucet in the hotel bathroom just kills me. Just paraphrasing now, but this:
MT: "It's broken."
JP: "How do you know it's broken? Maybe you just didn't tighten it enough?"
"I tightened it just right. I used a torque wrench and tightened it to exactly the correct lbs per sq in."
"How do you know the torque wrench was accurate?"
"Because it had just been calibrated by the official beaureau of weights and measures to be accurate."
"How accurate was it?"
"Dead on balls accurate!"
"It's an industry term"
Although Fred Gwynne's one liner may have stole another of Tomei's excellent scenes, ad the car expert "hostile witness".
JP: "I call Miss Mona Lisa to the stand as an expert witness."
MT: "I'm not testifying,forget it!"
JP "Can I call her as a hostile witness?"
FG "You two know each other?"
MT "Yeah, he's my fiancee."
FG "Well, that would certainly explain the hostility."
Followed by MT's short monologue beginning with "My father's a mechanic. His father was a mechanic. His three brothers were mechanics. Three of my four brothers are mechanics."
Opposing counsel: "So one of your brothers in not a mechanic?"
MT: "His wife is a mechanic."
Sue Ann: Leave it to Murray to find a bright spot in all this.
Susan Decker: Can you hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis?
Chris Knight: Not right now.
Susan Decker: A girl's got to have her standards.
Best moment in television! Chandler appearing from behind the door as if by magic to yell, “I knew it!” is the icing on the cake for that scene!
Now, go away!
No
Shrugs
She's hysterical
Did I think you would bust a cap in my crown? No
You and I have unfinished business
Pei Mei taught you the Five Palm Exploding Heart Technique?
Of course he did
How come you never told me?
I dunno. Because Im a bad person?
You are not a bad person. In fact, you are my favorite person.
How do I look?
You look ready
Alice: Eat 'em, like any other elephant.”
Alice: Eat 'em, like any other elephant.”
LO fooking L