The Gettleman Tapes – tape 2

These tapes were sent to me anonymously. I have 5 reel to reel tapes that arrived via Fedex. I have endeavored to transcribe these tapes accurately and to identify the speakers where possible. These will be released every two weeks as the season unfolds.

Tape 2 – The Joe Judge Interview (my title based on tape contents)


Dave Gettleman:

Joe, thanks for flying in on such short notice. You didn’t have to make these grilled cheese sandwiches for us. They are delicious, what’s the secret?

Joe Judge:

There’s no secret Dave, alright. I mean it’s simple, but it’s not easy. You just do your job – pick good ingredients, butter the bread, toast it, lay on the cheese, tomato and then let the heat do it’s work. There’s no last minute save or heroics – just do that each and every time and you have a winning grilled cheese sandwich.

John Mara:

Wow. This is our guy.

Steve Tisch:

Ditto.

Dave Gettleman:

Yeah, when we had Matt Rhule in the building his sandwiches were crap. Okay Joe, here in New York you have to know how to handle the press. It’s a different animal here. Let them know it’s not your first rodeo. Talk about the championships you’ve been a paht of. All the great players you’ve drafted like DeAndre Baker, Saquon Barkley, Daniel Jones. Can you handle the press or will I need to take you under my wing?

Joe Judge:

Look, I am who I am. We are going to play fast, tough, and smart football. Our team will hit you in the mouth. We will be a lunchpail team, blue collar like the people who pay for the PSL’s and cheer us on. We’re going to play complementary football and competitively lose a lot of games. I’m always going to be straight with the press corps about who we are and how we go about our business.


John Mara:

Wow. This is our guy.

Steve Tisch:

Ditto.

Dave Gettleman:

Now let’s talk about the qwaterback position. We have a guy we truly believe in – makes a great grilled cheese. Saw this first hand when I scouted him extensively for a few hours at the Senior Bowl. We just need to surround him with some gold jacket skill players and he can take us to the promised land. We already have the hawg mollies in front of him – really big, really slow guys. Some of them just need to get rid of the baby fat and learn a position they’ve never played before. What’s your take on the qwaterback?

Joe Judge:

Look, he’s one of eleven guys on offense. Everyone has to do their job for things to work. I’m not going to make a snap judgment on the quarterback. I’m going to look at the tape and then I’ll be able to make an assessment alright. I have to assess everyone and a lot of that in the beginning will come from studying the film.

Steve Tisch:

I like film.

John Mara:

Ditto.

Dave Gettleman:

Well, I’ve heard all I need to hear. We’re ramping up our analytics department, I’ve hired three new guys. We are using lots of numbahs, and three new guys will add lots of fingers and toes to the process. You’ll be joining a first class organization Joe, we are moving forward to the cutting edge of the NFL. If that isn’t enough for you I have five million other reasons for you to be our next head coach. Are you in?

Joe Judge:

I’m ready to go to work.

John Mara:

Great! Joe, can I get another grilled cheese?

Steve Tisch:

Ditto.