BBI and Social Media in General

That a message board is the same as Instagram or Facebook or Twitter. Maybe some threads can turn into that but for the most part BBI is typically a discussion forum, like Facebook was originally before it went of the rails.

The bad apples tilt the scales at times but it’s nothing close to what I think of for social media.

question.

social media is defined as websites or applications that allow people to create and/or share content.

BBI = Social Media, whether you "agree" it is or not.

That’s fair. I don’t participate in the major social media platforms. BBI is literally the only 1-to-many platform I use. Feels very different to me, but you are right.

but they are worlds apart which is my point. I don’t post on any of the major platforms, pretty much avoid it whenever possible outside of links sent to me from friends or checking out sports/movies/tv/music related material.

In comment 15168145 X said:

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an I posted maybe 25 times. Social media and online platforms are out of hand. 13 Things That Could Happen When You Quit Social Media - ( New Window )

Great link, thank you

But 20 years went by and like everything else it evolved. This place used to be like the corner bar where people would shoot the shit. But I now see the same trends in discourse here that I see other places.

and participate know no other way.

when they think there will be no consequences. SM is certainly the worst, but look at the real world, too. Women will get in a man's face and be disgusting because they don't believe a man will hit them. Same with people in cars, they'll give you the finger and curse you out, and drive off. Unfortunately for them, some of those social norms are changing a bit with road rage.

the biggest nut jobs on social media I know are adults, many in their 40s+. And I’m not taking about celebs, it’s people I know personally and have to effectively ignore or block.

In comment 15168299 UConn4523 said:

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the biggest nut jobs on social media I know are adults, many in their 40s+.

Agree but I would also include adults in their 30s too

that’s my age group, lunatics galore. Just meant the older crowd is plenty to blame. I shudder at the thought of my father being on Facebook or Twitter. It would be a total embarrassment. He can barely get into his email so I don’t think I’ll have to encounter it, thankfully.

in a good or bad way, just the style of it.

handle mostly). It's the only site on the web i visit every day.

members do treat each other horribly. i'm not sure why. much worse than any other forum i visit (cycling, golf forums, etc.).

regarding SM, i've dropped out of FaceBook. my high school friends have said terrible things to each other making terrible accusations. things they would never say in person. and these are people that are lifelong friends with each other. it seems people conflate their identity with a cause, then start to "root for the jersey" and lose all reason.

let's just say I don't expect my High School class to ever have another reunion.

exactly the opposite of what it was meant to do. Instead of bringing people closer together it is pulling us further apart.

And a lot of it is being controlled by the platforms. I’m not getting into any specifics on politics but I’ll just say I am an independent and have voted for both parties in the past. During this past election cycle I think I viewed a conservative post or two that someone I went to high school with had commented on. Next thing you know my Facebook feed is flooded with conservative feeds from people like Dan Bongino, Donald Trump Jr., etc. Facebook sees a few views of a certain political viewpoint and it’s like they open the flood gates. I’m sure the experience would have been the same if I had happened to view a few liberal posts. This is one of the reasons you see such polarization in thinking now. Not just in regard to politics, but other subjects as well.

In comment 15168313 markky said:

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handle mostly). It's the only site on the web i visit every day. members do treat each other horribly. i'm not sure why. much worse than any other forum i visit (cycling, golf forums, etc.). regarding SM, i've dropped out of FaceBook. my high school friends have said terrible things to each other making terrible accusations. things they would never say in person. and these are people that are lifelong friends with each other. it seems people conflate their identity with a cause, then start to "root for the jersey" and lose all reason. let's just say I don't expect my High School class to ever have another reunion.

The bolded alludes to what I was talking about in regards to style of posting.

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It became full of people who are 45+ just spewing bullshit. This isn’t an age issue, the crazy spreads across every generation.

In comment 15168334 Sean said:

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It became full of people who are 45+ just spewing bullshit. This isn’t an age issue, the crazy spreads across every generation.

Again, I'm not accusing anybody, young or old as spewing bullsh-t.

I'm talking mainly about the style of communication. It feels much more... I don't know. It feels like the constructs of the conversation have changed, no matter the subject. There feels like an air of "gotcha" to every conversation. Taking things out of context, removing nuance, etc...

what I'm saying is they were brought up on having conversation in this manner.

In comment 15168346 Britt in VA said:

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In comment 15168334 Sean said: Quote: It became full of people who are 45+ just spewing bullshit. This isn’t an age issue, the crazy spreads across every generation. Again, I'm not accusing anybody, young or old as spewing bullsh-t. I'm talking mainly about the style of communication. It feels much more... I don't know. It feels like the constructs of the conversation have changed, no matter the subject. There feels like an air of "gotcha" to every conversation. Taking things out of context, removing nuance, etc...

Agreed, it’s been headed down that path for a while now. This is the “gotcha” society where people have too much time on their hands and are looking for conflict and to find wrongs in everything. Especially since the pandemic started and everyone has been sheltered in their homes with social media their main outlet of communication in many cases.

In comment 15168130 pjcas18 said:

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educated or uneducated opinions, it's about dissent. People believe what they want, proven or not, due to confirmation bias and any other opinion is "miss information" or "conspiracy theories" or "incitement" and should be shut down or censored. that's not how free people live. it's how communists live. "I may not agree with what you say, but I sure as hell support your right to say it" - none of this stuff is fire in a movie theater, it's in many cases healthy dialog, but still gets shut down by arbitrary arbiters of "fact" and as mentioned there is also the freedom of people to act or say whatever they want behind the anonymity of a keyboard with no consequences. the two of those things merged and helped create the cesspool we see today.

Agree, its not about educated vs non-educated. In fact when I read someone say another has an un-educated opinion I Take it as that person saying the other is an idiot. Everyone has opinions, always has and always will. Social media has made it so that no matter what your opinion is, no matter how out there, you can find some people on the internet with like opinions. People spend all their time in this "echo chambers", agreeing with each other, and never having a discussion with a differing opinion and looking into why. It becomes "you're an idiot because you believe something different". All critical discussion, and looking at another point of view, are gone

In comment 15168287 Britt in VA said:

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But 20 years went by and like everything else it evolved. This place used to be like the corner bar where people would shoot the shit. But I now see the same trends in discourse here that I see other places.

I think you have nostalgic sense of BBI 20 years ago. Pre-login days this place was wild with dupes, nastiness, real world confrontations, genuine lunatics, not to mention a few real world sloppy romances that went sour in full display.

In comment 15168334 Sean said:

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It became full of people who are 45+ just spewing bullshit. This isn’t an age issue, the crazy spreads across every generation.

My impression, before I left FaceBook, is that the crazy is strongest with my generation (60 year olds). In all directions. It was like being in a shrapnel storm of crazy.

This has been a very enjoyable thread to be a part of. If conversations about issues (yes, some are far more emotional) were carried out like this, I do believe America would be a better place. We have gotten to a point unfortunately, that emotional reactions can distort perceptions, and therefore, create 'facts' that one believes.

America is truly a melting pot. We will always have differences. Our cultural origins don't have to be eliminated. The more we are forced to unite and be equal, I fear the further apart we will be pushed. With that said, fairness is a more realistic goal.

So, in fairness, let us unite in our love for the Giants, and our dislike for the Eagles and hope they suck for decades.

I filled the time void by joining Twitter. It was a good source for information and I followed the campaign and the pandemic, following basically people who agreed with my POV. Still, there were people who would respond to me who were obviously looking for a fight. Both there, and on BBI, I try my best not to engage. There's just no need for me to argue with people. Day after the election, I dropped Twitter. Also haven't watched the news for 4 months :)

Plenty of lunatics of all ages, but the 20 year olds in particular are so lost it's sad. And I'm not some oldie, only in my mid 30's. Facebook is more the older crowd, so the loons on there are older.

life there..Then Long Island, Queens and back to Long Island. The hate and bigotry were there as they are today, EXCEPT we ignored them and they slinked away. When they were given a “forum” or “permission” to show who they were, they came out of the “hate” closet to make themselves heard..

I’m only on Facebook which has allowed me to find and converse with those from my past as well as those I met and friended during competitive stair climb events throughout the country..Also have a bunch of offline friends that I met on here 20 years ago..

We should all hang out. One big huge BBI bbq tailgate. See what happens.

Put down the fucking phones you Millennials and go out for a bike ride.

In comment 15168463 PA Aggie said:

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So, in fairness, let us unite in our love for the Giants, and our dislike for the Eagles and hope they suck for decades.

This.

A bunch of posters slurped up the Eagles winning the Super Bowl and Justin Timberlake in the same week. Don't bother.

...I agree with many but I also wanted to add a factor. I am 46 - I gave up Facebook late 2016 and never went back. I stopped Twitter a few months ago but I will remain somewhat active on Instagram.

Just real quick on the social media and our addictions to phones - during the summer after the pandemic, my family got together for a weekend. I came down to join them in the common area and my 41 year old sister and law and her husband and 35 year old brother in law were all sitting buried in their phones. I stated their ages because I am not sure this is just an age thing. My mother in law is going to be 70 and she has instagram, I see her on it constantly and criticizing every photo. I offered, if this stresses you out so much, why not put it down?

I also think the lack of face to face discussions and just reading texts are also a contributor. Even with e-mails or interoffice collaboration software like Jabber or Slack, things can be lost without facial expressions or body language. I also agree there is something to a lot of your suggestions above that there is a lack of consequence with anonymity.

Great post SGMen and great comments by all.

Maybe my memory is faulty. I was here at Pete's corner pretty early too. Yea, I know, get off my lawn.

I just don't remember those days that way. There were good football posts. Some really excellent. But there was also lots of viscious and ignorant posting. Personal insults, off-topic trash, ignorant vituperative rants. I'm pretty sure that's what drove Eric to require registration and assigned user names to begin with - otherwise it was completely impossible to control the trolling.

I won't argue about the dismal quality of alot of online communications. I just don't think it 's much worse than it was unless you want to go back to the days when we used gopher and newsgroups and bulletin boards and had to install a seperate TCP/IP stack to get online.
And even then people were not any different. It was only a bit more civil because very few people were online and those who were tended to be as interested in the technology as they were in whatever topic was being discussed.

Not on Facebook or Instragam, but am on Twitter...& Good God is that a cesspool.

with social media is that I run into people who disagree with me so by definition they are wrong. I can’ be subjected to people who are wrong so I do the mature thing on FB by unfriending them or blocking them.

In comment 15168525 TJ said:

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Maybe my memory is faulty. I was here at Pete's corner pretty early too. Yea, I know, get off my lawn. I just don't remember those days that way. There were good football posts. Some really excellent. But there was also lots of viscious and ignorant posting. Personal insults, off-topic trash, ignorant vituperative rants. I'm pretty sure that's what drove Eric to require registration and assigned user names to begin with - otherwise it was completely impossible to control the trolling. I won't argue about the dismal quality of alot of online communications. I just don't think it 's much worse than it was unless you want to go back to the days when we used gopher and newsgroups and bulletin boards and had to install a seperate TCP/IP stack to get online. And even then people were not any different. It was only a bit more civil because very few people were online and those who were tended to be as interested in the technology as they were in whatever topic was being discussed.

Yes the good old days. I hope Matt in Syracuse is still alive and posting somewhere.

Twitter has a ton of useful people on it; it's a great resource for sports information for example. How awesome was Brian Baldinger's Twitter when the Giants' OL was playing well? Warren Sharp's Twitter is a must follow. I also get a ton of great soccer info through Twitter.

It's a great avenue for reading interesting info from smart, professional sources.

What I don't get is closely following family or friends. Who gives a shit about their politics, the endless pictures of their kids, where they went on vacation, or that they ran a 5K? That stuff is garbage. But it's a great tool for accessing smart people.

I'm currently banned on Facebook for 7 days lol

and to be honest? I love life without it.

Wife is on Instagram & addicted to it; I feel like she posts a photo of our daughter every week or so. If I was just a random friend of hers, I'd think, 'We get it. You got a cute kid. Anything else going on?' Haha.

In comment 15168544 Route 9 said:

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I'm currently banned on Facebook for 7 days lol

why am I not surprised?

In comment 15168155 PA Aggie said:

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Just wait until the current teens and 20-somethings get older. I believe all the observations on this thread so far are accurate, how social media allows you to be someone who you are not, with virtually no consequences for even the most outrageous statements. My kids, early to mid 20's, are social media crazy, as are most of their friends. It has completely absorbed their lives for the last 10+ years (likely my biggest failure as a parent). What are the results? Less of an ability to communicate face to face. Rock solid belief that Twitter has all the real news. Dependence on others (strangers) to look for approval. Lack of interest in any hobby, skill, or activities. Vocabulary limitations or oddities, including spelling like you are typing a text. (The boss will love 'ur' or 'lemme' in a report.) Having a history of bad photos out there which may spoil a job possibility. Constant checking of phone, attention spans are low in young people. Easy manipulation by big tech companies to engineer your media feed, or bend the truth to fit your narrative. Anxiety levels (Covid excluded) very high. I do think our country is rapidly changing in almost every facet. And I feel the younger generation is going to think, act, relate differently than previous generations, a lot due to social media. Okay, maybe that is not a bad thing? (I am not a fan of always finger pointing certain generations.) I would love to see some of the 'new thinking' look at issues differently and solve some of this. My confidence is not high. But we all can try to be more civil and positive to each other one post at a time, so when the baton is passed to the next, we know we did our best.

A good summary, alas.

because Facebook will ban you for the most comments/jokes?

In comment 15168567 Route 9 said:

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because Facebook will ban you for the most comments/jokes?

Just make sure you steer clear of 27 year old movie quotes. It makes me feel unsafe

It offers users extraordinary freedom to HIDE themselves from others, while it also allows them to REVEAL countless details of their lives. The net effect is that it allows us to curate, enhance and elevate our own lives, even as it allows us to critique, disparage and diminish the lives of others. And all of this is happening in public spaces that threaten to become more real than reality itself to a sizable chunk of the population.

In comment 15168572 Diversify yo bonds said:

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Just make sure you steer clear of 27 year old movie quotes. It makes me feel unsafe

lol did another movie get banned recently? What are you referencing?

In comment 15168580 Route 9 said:

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In comment 15168572 Diversify yo bonds said: Quote: Just make sure you steer clear of 27 year old movie quotes. It makes me feel unsafe lol did another movie get banned recently? What are you referencing?

P.C.U. is not a favorite of the moderation team apparently.

Chatter
Think Again


Plenty of books out there to either avoid turning into that person or explain what it's doing to people's brains. The research is starting to come out. Also, people truly believe that feelings and emotions are most important in their belief systems and they're not willing to reevaluate/update their beliefs.

It's not liberal, conservative etc. Social media just shorts our brains. Lots of reasons why. Everyone has turned into snowflakes....everyone thinks they're persecuted. Everyone seeks echo chambers. You should check out the research on that. When people ruminate on social media, they think it helps them. It doesn't. The evidence is pretty conclusive at this point. An interesting thing in Chatter talks about how time is immensely helpful in processing (obviously) and how social media completely removes time/distance. "Safetyism" is another reason - again, it's blind to political/religious affiliation.

I'm a therapist...many of my clients, regardless of religion, political affiliation or age, feel aggrieved by other people's opinions.

My recommendation? Turn off the news and get off social media. I'm still not even sure why I'm a member here. I realize after I post that it doesn't really add value to my life any more than just reading what some of the informed posters have to say. Certainly not like it did 20 years ago. Unfortunately, everyone, including myself, thinks they have a valid opinion lol.

People should read those books. If people want to know more things they can read for psychoeducation, you're all welcome to email me. My website is on my profile. I love this topic. I've been into it for years.

It's amazing, clearly just anecdotally, how many of my clients notice incredible changes in their mental health and happiness by putting their phones down or deleting social media. I also encourage people just to delete the app they use, so they can still check things like twitter, but they have to go out of their way to do so.

OK, now I'll shut up.

Actually just got a reply to my appeal today: I’m banned for life. I don’t even think what I said was that bad. But, yeah, banned from Twitter.

In comment 15168605 trueblueinpw said:

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Actually just got a reply to my appeal today: I’m banned for life. I don’t even think what I said was that bad. But, yeah, banned from Twitter.

Yeah, that's exactly what they're going for. Willfully ignorant of context just for whatever reason they can find to control (and change) speech. My collection of bannings on Facebook are all something bland, similar to something that you'd find on a sitcom. One of my FB bannings, I got a timeout because in some football trash group because.... I mentioned meth.

Whatevs. Their call I guess, just hope one day our laws do not mirror Facebook's community standards or else I'm in deep doo-doo. In real life, I'm pretty cool and have a lot of charisma and when I get going, I'm a pretty funny guy.

do not have to look another in the eye and state their case .... that is when the "troll" was invented.

It went from "breakin balls" light heartedly to VENOM very quickly. Sad.

Just know that (at anytime) it could become impossible to have an intelligent conversation on any topic.