NFT: Struggling

I'm going to add you to my prayer list. I hope you have a great holiday, and also let us know sometime how you are doing.

keep going brother...


Through struggle you'll find strength.

Between work, being sick, my mom has dementia and my dad is really struggling with his health. To top it off, my sisters who don't work, decided that I'm the one to go to with every single issue. I take a few deep breaths, talk to my soon to be wife who always calms me and I do a Daboll. One thing at a time, focus on it, do your best and on to the next issue. Winston Churchill said it best, when you are going through hell, keep going.

Whatever it is, you are never alone, someone has it way worse and tomorrow is a new start. Cliches yes, but lean on the wisdom of others, believe you have what it takes and just keep going. Glad you shared, that's a big help always.

by focusing on what you are thankful for.

Just had that discussion with one of my sons. I find that when going through rough times I need to take a step back, remind myself to be thankful, pray, and then focus on one thing at a time. Too much at once can overload the system.

You got a lot on your plate! My father has dementia, and just that alone is one of the toughest things I've ever gone through. To have a parent with dementia and all the other stuff, gotta be overwhelming. Hang in there and keep staying positive!

Sorry things are rough.

My 2 cents, when things are bad take that minute (as you do here, ITG) to see what you’re thankful for. And know you’re in that part of the movie where the main character is getting it from all sides, but act 3 will come, and things will calm down. “Everyone’s got it easier…” is natural but not helpful. Truth is, a lot of people are ducks, calm on the surface but paddling like hell below.

Joey, sorry about your mom. Being the sandwich generation sux. I saw my mom through the disease that took Tom Coughlin’s wife, PSP. It was brutal in time and emotional stress. It’s so rough to see your loved one slip away replaced with their shell, who can still be a pain in the ass. Lean on your support. If it gets bad enough, look into your county hospice services. I don’t know if she’s living with you, but many have respite care, they’ll take them for a brief period just to give you a breather, among other services.

Take care of yourselves.

the best. Most things aren't as bad as we think they are.

It was actually developing for a year or two but I was too much of a dumbass to realize it. Last two months, it has really accelerated.

I'm lucky I work remotely (for now) and my brother is also here. But I gotta say, it is the toughest thing I ever had to face, especially the 24 hour care she needs, which me and my brother split.

But as others have said, you have to realize that's life and just keep going for as long as you can.

I think the loneliness and isolation my mom experienced during the covid epidemic played a huge role in her dementia. We were super careful never to expose her but as a result, she was very isolated and deteriorated mentally.

I definitely second guess myself about being so strict during covid.

Everything is working out for you. Your the operant power (you really are). Mark 11:24 Just go to sleep at night with the feeling whatever you want is a done deal. Its pretty simple

In comment 15911668 Vanzetti said:

Quote:

It was actually developing for a year or two but I was too much of a dumbass to realize it. Last two months, it has really accelerated. I'm lucky I work remotely (for now) and my brother is also here. But I gotta say, it is the toughest thing I ever had to face, especially the 24 hour care she needs, which me and my brother split. But as others have said, you have to realize that's life and just keep going for as long as you can. I think the loneliness and isolation my mom experienced during the covid epidemic played a huge role in her dementia. We were super careful never to expose her but as a result, she was very isolated and deteriorated mentally. I definitely second guess myself about being so strict during covid.

Definitely don't beat yourself up, I was the same way with my dad. Dementia isn't like a gradual hill, it's a downward staircase...and there's no stopping it. Things gets worse quickly, then level off, then regress quickly again. Example...my dad had been doing pretty well, then last week he started having walking issues and incontinence. They thought it might be a stroke, but it's just another step of the disease.

I've been through it with 2 grandparents, and now my dad. My uncle took care of my grandparents...and now I have a ton more respect for him and what he went through. He can predict what the next stage will be.

Hang in there, and like I Said, don't beat yourself up. Your mom's symptoms would've progressed regardless. It's just the nature of the (literal) beast.

just to reiterate what others have said, I'll include you in my prayers.

And I know it may be hard to do, but nothing wrong with asking for help, or at least someone to talk to.

tons of resources available I bet in your community, sometimes it's therapeutic just to unload and have someone there just to listen.

if you're stuck, while I'm not a professional, you can reach out to me over email, and I'd get on a call and listen if you thought it would help - let me know and I'll send you my email address.

You are in my prayers. Be strong and confident. You will get through whatever you're going through. It's temporary. Remember that.

Same to you, Joey. I'm in the same boat with becoming the family caretaker. It's very difficult and carries a lot of responsibility for which I do not feel very prepared. Good luck to you.

Shall pass.

Only advice is not to compare against others
Facebook and other media platforms show how wonderful life is because that is what people want to present

Take some productive alone time rewatch a giants win go for a walk read a book etc. good luck and sounds like you are taking the right steps n

Will be praying for you

Wishing you the best during these tough times.

It definitely helps

And to those who commented that are also going through tough times, you aren't alone. If I can help in any way, even if it's just an ear to listen please don't hesitate to reach out.

Today is a new day, happy friday

Personally prayer is what helps me

everyone struggles

going on. There's always many others struggling as you are, even worse so, can't get stuck dwelling and falling into the rabbit hole of it.

The combo of my son being born later in my life, losing my father suddenly only months later, and three years of new dad and company being bought insanity have been killing me. But, there's so much to be grateful for and this too shall pass. Focus on the positives, try to not dwell on the negatives or the minutiae of the struggle. Be mentally agile, keep moving and ticking off things to do so you have accomplishments to be proud of.

Fallacy of social media you constantly see a fake stream of "moments"

Hang in there, nothing is irreversible, everything can be patched in time.

is dealing with parent's end of life.

Sometimes, family comes together and handles it well (so I've heard. Have yet to see it in person) Just as often it's a big cluster fuck.

To Joey, and anyone else dealing with this, I hope you can maintain a positive view toward family. After dealing with my father's very lengthy decline, I've lost the closeness I once had with my siblings. I see them in a whole new light.

Everyone has their own coping method in troubled times, but all successful methods involve gravitating toward the positive/good. Find that light and head towards it.

that manifested itself in different ways, sometimes when I didn't even realize it. While I don't think anyone ever totally rids themselves of worry or stress in this life, I like to think I've at least personally found ways to deal with these obstacles.

My children completely changed my life for the better. I did not know I had the potential to love anyone or anything as much as I love them, and now I live my life with the mindset of being as strong and sturdy as I can be for them. How can I be the best man I can be? How can I be the best provider? I wake up in the morning now and I think about how I need to literally conquer each day so that I make my family's life as great as it can be. That's really helped, but even still I know that at times beneath the surface there are the anxieties I deal with that no one on the outside of my every day life can see.

This is why I try to live by the saying of treat everyone with kindness because you don't know what others have on their plate. Never be envious of others because even if you don't think it's true, everyone else is carrying around their own sorrows. This is even more relevant in the age of social media where people present, for the most part, only the best of their lives and leave out the worst. I also try to remember this. If we all threw our problems into a big pile, you would likely take yours back.

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